The Sweetest Poison in the Blood
by mirrorOfsin
Summary: "Shaking with aguish fear, and pain, she kissed and kissed her with a hungry mouth." Bellatrix/Narcissa throughout the years from 1966. Blackcest. Full warnings inside. Please review!
1. Chapter 1

Title: The Sweetest Poison in the Blood - Part XIII

Author: themirrorofsin

Ship: Bellatrix/Narcissa, with background Lucius/Narcissa, Bellatrix/Rodolphus

Genre(s): Romance/Hurt/Comfort

Rating: M/ NC 17

Summary: "Shaking with aguish fear, and pain, she kissed and kissed her with a hungry mouth."

Warning: Incest, sex, mentions of sex between minors, mentions of abuse, language, self-harm.

She clung about her sister,

Kissed and kissed and kissed her:

Tears once again

Refreshed her shrunken eyes,

Dropping like rain

After long sultry drouth;

Shaking with aguish fear, and pain,

She kissed and kissed her with a hungry mouth.

_Goblin Market_, Christina Rossetti

Prologue

1970 – August

Bellatrix could feel her sister's gaze bore into her back but she shrugged it off. She continued to apply her deep crimson lipstick carefully in the silence that hung in the bedroom until she finally broke it.

"Stop it," she murmured as she dabbed at the corner of her mouth with her finger.

She glanced over her shoulder, Narcissa didn't look away and she sighed heavily. Her sister looked so beautiful with her blonde hair wild around her face and her kiss-bruised lips. Normally Narcissa would have smiled at her older sister but right now her face was hard and her eyes resentful.

"How can you jump from my bed to his? Does this mean nothing?" Narcissa accused her quietly.

Bellatrix frowned angrily, "It's not like that."

"Isn't it?" Narcissa sat up, covers clutched to her chest looking exactly as a distraught lover. "That's exactly it, I think."

"Then you're a fool," Bellatrix muttered turning back to inspect her appearance once more. Narcissa grabbed the nearest pillow and threw it angrily at her. It hit Bellatrix squarely on the back, knocking her forwards into the vanity table sending items rolling off onto the floor.

"Look what you've done!" Bellatrix jumped and whirled around to glare at her sister who aimed another pillow at her. If Narcissa was honest she wanted to throw anything and everything at Bellatrix, not caring if it hurt her.

_I'm hurting_, she thought bitterly.

Bellatrix caught it and tossed it aside, stalking up to Narcissa who tried to hit her. The sister's fought on the bed, Bellatrix tried to fend off the blows and hold her down as Narcissa struggled against her, occasionally slapping her or kicking her from under the covers.

"Narcissa, stop!" Bellatrix hissed finally managing to pin her hands back onto the mattress and leaned above her.

Narcissa arched furiously against the restraints, "No!" she struggled but knew that it was futile. They remained like that for a few minutes, breathing hard and unwanted lust sparked inside Narcissa as she gazed up at her sister. Bellatrix didn't fail to notice – it reflected in her eyes too. She pressed down, slowly letting go of Narcissa's wrists as she did. Narcissa wrapped her arms around her and buried her face against her sister's neck. She breathed in that familiar and completely intoxicating scent that was Bellatrix.

Unbidden Narcissa's treacherous mind whispered to her all the things she didn't want to think about. She hated the thought of her sister in bed with someone else. Her fears made her throat thick, her heart ache and her body tensed. Bellatrix raised her head up to look down at her, brushing back a strand of blonde hair as she did.

"I don't want you to marry him," Narcissa managed to whisper as tears pricked her eyes.

Bellatrix pressed their foreheads together and sighed, "Cissa…"

Her sister was still so young to understand what she was doing, what all of this meant.

"Please don't," Narcissa begged bringing her hands up to Bellatrix's face, pressing kisses over her cheeks, neck and finally her lips. "Please."

"I will," Bellatrix said returning Narcissa's urgent kiss. "But it changes nothing."

The grandfather clock chimed loudly in the hallway outside. Bellatrix should have left by now but she continued to kiss her sister, to ease her fears. Then slowly Bellatrix eased back, sitting up and traced her fingers down Narcissa's bare neck, shoulder and down her arm, watching her sister shiver in desire. Bellatrix smile was faint as she got up off the bed smoothing her hands down her dress. She crossed back to the mirror to fix her lipstick where much of it had rubbed off on Narcissa. Then, without a word, she left her room with Narcissa curled up on the bed with tears in her eyes.


	2. Chapter 2

Title: The Sweetest Poison in the Blood - Part II

Author: themirrorofsin

Ship: Bellatrix/Narcissa, with background Lucius/Narcissa, Bellatrix/Rodolphus

Genre(s): Romance/Hurt/Comfort

Rating: M/ NC 17

Summary: "Shaking with aguish fear, and pain, she kissed and kissed her with a hungry mouth."

Warning: Incest, sex, mentions of sex between minors, mentions of abuse, language, self-harm.

Part II

Alas my love you do me wrong

To cast me off discourteously;

And I have loved you oh so long

Delighting in your company.

_Greensleeves_

4 months later - December

Their bodies were slick sweat and desire, writhing together until, finally, Bellatrix let them both come. Narcissa was grateful of the silencing charm in place as she all but screamed and Bellatrix gave a throaty cry. They lay panting, holding tightly onto one another with only one candle burning in the dark.

It was the last night that Narcissa would have Bellatrix Black as her own. If she would ever have her sister again it would be Bellatrix Lestrange. Narcissa mouthed that name and it sounded alien, rolling off her tongue awkwardly. It was a name that belonged to another woman, not her Bella.

But that was true, she thought in the dark. Sometimes it was as if there were two Bellatrix's existing. One, that would be Lestrange, with her crowd of witches and wizards that drew her deeper into the darkness. Then the other showed her kindness – which was rare and evermore precious – and who loved her above all else.

She, Bellatrix and Andromeda had been raised with little kindness or love but under the strict and singular tutorage from their father placed on her, Bellatrix found those feelings strange and unwanted if she was to live up to their family's expectations. Bellatrix still never told Narcissa exactly what happened when their father tutored her but she had seen marks across Bellatrix's body once or twice to make disturbing conclusions. Bellatrix, it seemed, showed little compassion to anyone except to her sister and Narcissa treasured this knowledge greatly.

"What are you thinking about?"

Narcissa shook her head and felt Bellatrix sigh against her throat. "You should go before dawn."

"I will," Narcissa murmured even though she wanted to protest. Bellatrix pressed small kisses across her neck and felt Narcissa's hands tighten about her.

"You're squashing me," Bellatrix breathed.

"I don't care," Narcissa scowled but did loosen her arms a little.

Bellatrix smirked in response, "But we still have time…" she trailed off letting her fingers meaningfully brushed her breast and tweaked her nipple before skimming her hand further down before Narcissa caught it and pressed it against her stomach.

"You don't have to… tomorrow, I mean. You can still change your mind."

"But I won't," Bellatrix kissed her shoulder and pulled her hand free, continuing its path down. "Nothing will change."

_It will_, Narcissa thought but kept her mouth shut and concentrated on Bellatrix sliding down her body. Tomorrow night it wouldn't be her in Bellatrix's bed but her _husband_ and it made Narcissa sick at the thought of their wedding night.

A sharp pain jolted through her body where Bellatrix had stabbed her finger hard on her hip. "You should be paying attention."

"Sorry," Narcissa muttered threading her fingers through Bellatrix's dark wild hair as her sister lay her chin against her hip.

"What is it?" Bellatrix asked not without a trace of annoyance in her voice. "If it's about my marriage, I've told you a _thousand_ times why. We need more pureblood allies and the Lestranges provide that."

"But you like him?"

Bellatrix untangled herself from her sister and sat up irritated. "Again, I have no particular feelings for him."

"How can you marry him if you feeling nothing?" Narcissa argued sitting up too. "I wouldn't…"

"So, you'd marry for _love_?" Bellatrix spat in contempt and Narcissa saw her dark eyes glitter with anger.

"I…" Narcissa hadn't thought about it. She hadn't thought of marrying anyone as she never entertained the idea of living without Bellatrix.

"Marriages aren't all about love, our parents are a prime example. They didn't marry for love but for duty and honour," Bellatrix snapped at her. "_'Toujours pur'_."

"I know, but –"

"Besides," Bellatrix cut her off moving back towards her, leaning in. "Shouldn't you be happy? If I don't love him then you can stop thinking of him as a threat."

Narcissa bristled, "And him? What does_ he_ feel?"

Bellatrix shrugged reaching out to curl her finger around her hair. "I don't know, he just wants to fuck me – I don't think there's love in that, do you?"

She grinned wickedly but Narcissa didn't smile back. She sighed and lack back down on her side away from Bellatrix. Bellatrix shuffled over and pushed against her shoulder so that Narcissa moved onto her back and pressed down over her.

"Don't be like this, Cissa. Don't waste time," she purred by her ear, nipping her earlobe as she did. Narcissa grabbed her and had Bellatrix on her back in seconds. If Bellatrix was surprised it only showed for a moment before she grinned up at her sister who pinned her down.

_Good, reserved, cold_, Narcissa tilted her head gazing down. She guessed that there were two of her as well. She would never describe herself like that when she was with her sister and she knew it would always be like that. After all, it would only be Bellatrix that she would love with such intensity.

Bellatrix let Narcissa dominate as it made her smile to see her younger sister react so strongly and possessively. Narcissa was hell-bent on making this night last and Bellatrix had never seen Narcissa as passionate as she was then.

That night Narcissa remembered the first time they had kissed, a proper kiss, not the silly little ones of when they had been much younger. She knew that at fifteen it was rare, practically impossible, to know true love but she did. She had known since she was eleven, with her first kiss, that no one would come close in the way she felt for Bellatrix. It was the worst of sins and it rested heavily upon her but she couldn't stop herself. Her sister was her world, her air, her everything. It seemed that, even though she was the youngest, she was the only one who could deal with the great intensity that Bellatrix was. She had heard it whispered, Bellatrix's "madness" as it were, but Narcissa refused this. Her sister wasn't mad, she was just intense. Her emotions seemed to only be in extremities. Extreme rage, sorrow, jealously…love. It was frightening but, so far, Bellatrix had never hurt her, at least not on purpose. The same couldn't be said for all the others that engaged with Bellatrix's wrath. She gave her sister balance and brought her back down to reality when she needed it most. She loved Bellatrix with all her being and the coming day was going to break her heart. She knew that Bellatrix had to, there was no question about that, but to her young self it felt like the biggest betrayal.

She wished she could stop it but soon the night began to fade into day. When the first few rays of dawn came in like a thief through the window expelling the dark, her heart ached in her chest. Narcissa sat huddled at the end of the bed watching her sleeping lover and admired the way the sunlight gently touched her pale naked skin. She ached in want to lie next to her, to wake with the morning sun and bask in kisses and embraces but she wasn't supposed to be there. She climbed out quietly, shrugging on her nightgown and paused for a moment to gently kiss Bellatrix's cheek before she crept out, not noticing Bellatrix open her eyes.

After a few minutes she slowly sat up, pushing her wild hair from her face and gazed out of the window, watching the sunlight stream into her room. She felt nothing, not even that seething anger she had towards this marriage. But she was quite comfortably numb, tilting her head as if listening to someone and slowly traced the creases on the sheets. She stayed like for hours until she heard her mother's footfalls and she quickly pulled on her nightdress to cover her nakedness. As her mother marched into her room she looked faintly surprised to see her daughter already awake but then told her, in her cold and haughty voice to get up and not waste time.

After all, she said with a tight and rare smile, it was her wedding day.


	3. Chapter 3

**Title:** The Sweetest Poison in the Blood - Part III

**Author:** themirrorofsin

**Ship:** Bellatrix/Narcissa, with background Lucius/Narcissa, Bellatrix/Rodolphus

**Genre(s):** Romance/Hurt/Comfort

**Rating**: M/ NC 17

**Summary**: "_Shaking with aguish fear, and pain, she kissed and kissed her with a hungry mouth_."

**Warning:** Incest, sex, mentions of sex between minors, mentions of abuse, language.

Part III

Thinking of you, and all that was, and all

That might have been and now can never be

_- Monna Innominata_, 9, Christina Rossetti

As she descended the stairs and made her way towards the kitchen she thought how quiet the house seemed, how empty now that there was one less person living there. Andromeda barely looked up from her copy of the _Daily Prophet_ as she came in and sat down, gingerly helping herself to some toast. Narcissa nibbled on the bread feeling even more alone than she had before. She glanced at the seat that Bellatrix had always occupied and she realised then that Bellatrix would possibly never sit there again. She tried to blink her tears away but Andromeda saw and put down her paper.

"What's wrong? You've been sulking and crying this whole week," she frowned at her younger sister. "Mother isn't happy."

"I don't care," Narcissa murmured abandoning the toast.

"Well, whatever it is, pull yourself together as I'm the one who's going to get the blame if you continue to strop."

"How can you just sit there and not be upset?" Narcissa asked miserably. "Don't you miss her at all?"

Andromeda blinked, surprised and then frowned, "This is because of Bellatrix?" She looked astounded for moment.

"Of course," Narcissa brushed a tear away. "I miss her." She looked up to see Andromeda staring at her as if she had grown another head. "What?"

"I just can't believe that all of this," she waved her hand at her, "Has been because of _Bellatrix_. She's only been gone one _week_!"

Narcissa glared at her and repeated, "I miss her."

"Well, I _don't_," Andromeda said forcefully and went back to looking at the paper.

"Wh-what?" Narcissa gasped.

Andromeda glanced up annoyed now, "You heard me Cissa, I don't miss her and I'm _glad_ she's gone. Now someone else can deal with her."

"How can you be so cruel?" Narcissa started to cry again.

"Me?" Andromeda laughed. "You really have no idea about her do you?"

"You're just jealous that she prefers me to you!" Narcissa shouted.

"Hardly," Andromeda said coolly. "Look at yourself Narcissa, do you think Bellatrix is crying her eyes out over you?"

"You don't know her," Narcissa said quietly.

"But I do," Andromeda stood. "I know her a hell of a lot better than _you_ do."

"Why do you hate her? She's your sister!"

Andromeda paused for a second before answering quietly, "She might be my sister but there are things I can't forgive. I hope, for your sake, that being away from her will help because she's a bad influence, Narcissa. She doesn't deserve your love, pity or anything because she will destroy you."

Narcissa sat there stunned as her sister left and she felt as if someone had torn at her heart. Andromeda was wrong, Bellatrix loved her and she did deserve her love. Whatever happened between her sisters Narcissa wasn't going to be a part of it.

"Miss?" a small, tentative voice sounded by her and she looked down at the house-elf.

"Yes?" she asked her tone dull.

"Is there anything we can get you?" the house-elf asked but she shook her head and stood as well.

"No, there's nothing I want," she said. _Except my sister, except Bellatrix_.

She went back upstairs, Andromeda was gone but that was hardly a surprise. Her sister was hardly ever around when she was a home during the holidays, always out with friends that Bellatrix said would shame their family. Narcissa bypassed her own room and instead opened the door to the now unoccupied room that once belonged to Bellatrix Black.

Only a few discarded clothes hung in the wardrobe and some books and things scattered around the room. She stood in the doorway gazing around with a heavy heart before she stepped inside and shut the door. She trailed her fingers over some papers and then across the ornaments left on the vanity table. She turned to look at the bed and, lifting a small perfume flask, she sprayed it over the sheets before setting it back down. Slipping her shoes off, she crawled onto the bed and pulled up the covers. She turned her face into the sheets that were now a mix of the washing powder the house-elves used and Bellatrix's perfume. In this way she could at least pretend that Bellatrix was here with her. As she closed her eyes, tugging the covers up to swallow her, in the dark she felt safe, connected to her even though she was far away.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** TBC - reviews are love and thanks to everyone who has! :)


	4. Chapter 4

**Title:** The Sweetest Poison in the Blood - Part IV

**Author:** themirrorofsin

**Ship:** Bellatrix/Narcissa, with background Lucius/Narcissa, Bellatrix/Rodolphus

**Genre(s):** Romance/Hurt/Comfort

**Rating**: M/ NC 17

**Summary**: "_Shaking with aguish fear, and pain, she kissed and kissed her with a hungry mouth_."

**Warning:** Incest, sex, mentions of sex between minors, mentions of abuse, language.

A/N: Sorry about the wait for this chapter. I was on holiday for a while. But that gave me the best opportunity to concentrate and write the next couple of chapters! This fic wasn't supposed to turn out into so many chapters but it couldn't be contained into a one-shot that I had planned a year ago.

The chapters jump back in time so just to make you aware of this. Thank you to everyone who has reviewed and all the rest for this fic! :D

Part IV

Because I love you more than I can say,

If I could tell you I would let you know.

- _If I Could Tell You_, Auden

1966 – Summer 

Her sister had been less turbulent these past couple of days, no fits of rage, manic glee or the pensive gloom she was prone to. She had even been quite pleasant towards Andromeda which made Narcissa happy. There was a lot of tension between her sister's and their arguments had gotten worse over the past couple of months. Narcissa hated it but she always found herself going to comfort Bellatrix. She loved Andromeda but Andromeda never needed her like Bellatrix did. She would go and try to make Bellatrix laugh, more often failing but eventually she would calm down and let Narcissa cuddle up to her. Once Andromeda told her that she shouldn't do that, that Bellatrix didn't deserve her kindness or care. Narcissa fumed at her sister, not understanding why Andromeda said such things and Andromeda just looked disgusted at her devotion and told her she was wasting her time on someone who would never put her above her own needs. When Narcissa told Bellatrix that later huddled on her bed, Bellatrix laughed and ruffled her hair.

"Andromeda is jealous. I almost pity her."

"She's wrong though, you _do_ care about me," Narcissa bit her lip worried and Bellatrix took both her hands into her own.

"Of course I do, Cissa. I –" she broke off quickly, yanking her hands away as if she had been burnt.

"What? What's wrong?" Narcissa moved forward but Bellatrix backed away from her.

"Don't," she commanded and Narcissa froze. Bellatrix looked angry and then confused before she scowled and ran her hand through her wild dark hair.

"Bella?"

When she didn't answer, Narcissa said her name again shifting towards her carefully. Bellatrix eyed her wearily but didn't move. "What were you going to say?"

"Nothing."

Narcissa sighed and took her hand, "Please tell me?" she gave her that innocent look that often got her what she wanted.

"It was nothing," Bellatrix muttered staring at their entwined fingers.

"I'm not a child," Narcissa scowled, sounding exactly that and Bellatrix gave a dry chuckle.

"Oh but you are," she sounded almost sad as she said that. "You are a child, you are eleven."

"And you're only fifteen, hardly an adult," Narcissa protested.

Bellatrix sighed, "Can we just go to sleep now?"

Narcissa wanted to object but stopped herself as she really didn't want to argue with Bellatrix tonight and so lay down with her sister. She snuggled back so that her back was pressed against her sister's front and felt Bellatrix's arms encircled her tightly. They were always close, affectionately touching or pressing kisses onto each other's cheeks or forehead. No one else in their family showed any kind of warmth to each other. It made their mother snap at them if she ever caught them holding hands or hugging. Narcissa didn't care though she felt so safe and loved like this that she smiled into the dark that she whispered, "I love you Bella."

Bellatrix said nothing but her arms squeezed her for a second and Narcissa didn't mind that her sister never said it back to her. She didn't have to.

/

The next day was hot, the whole summer seemed as if the temperature was just increasing every day. Their mother wasn't pleased as it made her uncomfortable in her clothes and, for what seemed the hundredth time that summer, wished that she was spending her time in the south of France instead. Narcissa still couldn't believe that this was her first summer after she had followed her sisters to Hogwarts. A whole year had been and gone and she wondered if she had dreamt getting a wand, her school robes and entering the Great Hall for the first time. She had sneaked a look at her sisters who sat on the Slytherin table, Bellatrix having already made a spot for her confidant that Narcissa would be in Slytherin. That had been one of Narcissa's biggest fears – to be in another house and shame her family, her sister.

The summer was going fast too, though there were more noticeable shifts within the family. Or maybe Narcissa hadn't been aware of the tension that their father brought in with him or the fact that Bellatrix avoided him as much as possible. Andromeda seemed to be continually disappointing their mother in some way and actually Narcissa had barely seen her sister. She was nearly always out with friends that were deemed unworthy by their status.

When Narcissa woke up, Bellatrix was already up and dressed, sitting at her vanity table watching her. As Narcissa sat up Bellatrix informed her that they were going to go out and Narcissa grinned enthusiastically. Narcissa always preferred spending time with her oldest sister and was delighted that Bellatrix wanted to spend the day with her. Pulling on a dress she didn't mind getting a little dirty she followed her sister out into the sunshine.

The two of them wandered the countryside surrounding their house. It served as a dual purpose of spending time together and being away from their mother whose mood was incredibly foul that morning due to the heat. None of the girls wanted to be on the receiving end of a scolding or, on occasion, a slap that sometimes came. Bellatrix got it more often because of her own temper and back-mouthed their mother. Narcissa wondered if Bellatrix deliberately did that so that mother wouldn't hit or taunt _her_, always jumping in when their mother turned towards Narcissa. They snuck out through the backdoor even though Narcissa knew they should have asked permission. Bellatrix just rolled her eyes and set off with Narcissa running after her and they eventually made their way over to the river.

"Narcissa?"

Narcissa jumped out of her thoughts and gasped as she saw her sister standing with her hands on her hips, stripped down to just her underwear, grinning up at her from the edge of the river bank.

"What are you doing?" Narcissa squeaked trying not to look at her sister's developed body and the seductive cut of her black lace underwear against her beautifully pale skin.

"Swimming of course," Bellatrix smiled and then turned and carefully put her foot in. "Fuck its cold!"

"Bella!" Narcissa admonished then laughed as Bellatrix continued to swear. "That underwear…"

"Like it?" Bellatrix smirked standing in the river up to her thighs. It wasn't very deep and at least clean. The river was a favourite spot for them when they roamed around together.

"Mother will have a fit," Narcissa muttered moving hesitantly.

"She doesn't know," Bellatrix raised her eyebrow. "Coming in or do I have to drag you?"

"You wouldn't," Narcissa said though she knew that Bellatrix would. "You could have told me we were going swimming, I could have brought my swimming costume."

"You hate your swimming costume and besides," Bellatrix waded in deeper so that the furthest the water would go was up to her chest. "I didn't know we were going swimming until now."

Narcissa frowned coming down the sloping bank and slowly, turning her back to her sister who laughed at her prudish behaviour, pulled off her dress and shoes. Painfully aware of how small her chest was in comparison to Bellatrix's, Narcissa folded her arms around herself and proceeded to gingerly get into the water.

"It's freezing!" she yelped pulling her foot back out.

"Don't be such a baby, it's lovely," Bellatrix called to her as she swam back and forth. "Come on Cissa!"

"But our underwear will be all wet," Narcissa complained.

"Take it off then," Bellatrix said simply. "I was going to but didn't think you'd approve."

Narcissa couldn't help but blush at that. Seeing her sister in her underwear was one thing but seeing her completely naked was another… Even though Narcissa had to admit her sister's choice left little to the imagination. Her own was white and pretty, if not a little childish, in white cotton with two small pink bows on the otherwise plain knickers and bra. Even though her breasts were nowhere near the size of Bellatrix's she had developed far more than her sister had been at eleven and also compared to some of the other girls at Hogwarts. Narcissa had actually needed to wear a bra unlike the others that padded their chests out with tissues.

"Right, you're taking too long," Bellatrix announced swimming up to her and grabbed Narcissa's arm and pulled her in, just like she said. Narcissa cried out as the water hit her and she spluttered and shivered whilst Bellatrix laughed and angrily Narcissa splashed a load of water in her face.

"Ooh fighting are we?" Bellatrix mocked before splashing her back and then full-scale war broke out. The two girls shrieked and laughed hitting each other with water and trying to out-swim the other. Eventually they called a truce, too tired to continue though Bellatrix gave one last splash to determine herself the overall winner. They moved down the river till they reached the small bridge that they often sat on and took some shelter from the sun underneath. They faced each other and smiled slightly treading water even though they both could reach the floor.

"I wish it could always be like this," Narcissa said suddenly, her voice echoing slightly. "Just us."

"It can be," Bellatrix said evenly stretching out her hand and Narcissa took it.

"But you'll be leaving Hogwarts soon –"

"Not for another three years," Bellatrix interjected.

"But _still_," Narcissa looked sad.

"It will always be us," Bellatrix squeezed her hand. "After all, you're the only one who loves me."

Narcissa paused for a moment in thought then said, "What about father? –"

"No," Bellatrix said sharply. "He doesn't love me. Whatever you think, believe me, it's not love."

"What is it then?"

"Something that doesn't concern you," Bellatrix said snapped and the softened seeing Narcissa's face fall. "You don't need to worry about it."

Narcissa said nothing and Bellatrix sighed heavily. "Now you're in a mood with me."

"I'm not!" Narcissa protested but Bellatrix already looked irritated as she started to swim back down the river. "Bella!"

Narcissa hastily swam after her and moved in front of her, forcing her to look at her. "Look, I'm not in a mood, I promise!" she smiled brightly to show her sister and Bellatrix considered her for a moment then sighed once again.

"Poor Narcissa, you're always trying to please me," Bellatrix reached out to stroke a strand of wet hair from her face. "Why?"

"Because you're my sister and I love you," Narcissa said truthfully and a curious look passed over Bellatrix's face then it was gone.

"Well, we should dry off," she said changing conversation. Narcissa followed her lead and they got up and out of the river, quickly retrieving their belongings. Thankfully theirs was the only house around for miles and it was very rare for strangers to pass so the sisters risked staying in their underwear until they were dry enough. The heat of the day helped and soon enough, although still damp, they pulled on their dresses and lay out on the grass side by side underneath a large chestnut tree nearby.

"We never take Andromeda with us," Narcissa said dreamily staring up through the branches.

"She wouldn't come, not with me anyway," Bellatrix murmured with her eyes closed.

"Why don't you like each other?" Narcissa asked rolling onto her side.

Bellatrix shrugged, "Not all siblings get on. Our cousins don't."

"Well, that's because Sirius is a Gryffindor," Narcissa wrinkled her nose. "Andromeda isn't."

"She might as well be," Bellatrix yawned as if bored by the conversation. "Do we have to talk about her? It's so dreary – another reason I don't ask her to come with us."

Narcissa giggled, "You're terrible! Andromeda isn't dreary."

"She is!" Bellatrix insisted turning to face her sister with a wicked smile. "She's always going on about her awful friends and boring things."

"Bella!" Narcissa laughed and nestled up to her sister.

"Come on, you think so too!"

"Well, a little," Narcissa admitted then groaned. "Please don't tell her!"

"She already knows that you prefer me to her," Bellatrix teased but truth rang in her statement.

"But still, she's our sister," Narcissa told her quietly.

"Sometimes I don't believe she is," Bellatrix muttered more to herself and neither of them pressed the matter further. To lighten the mood Narcissa leaned up on her elbow and gazed down at her sister.

"We should go shopping," she told her with a smile.

"Really?" Bellatrix drawled. "You mean _you _should go shopping and I should hang around, tell you how pretty you look and pay for it?" Bellatrix closed her eyes again.

"Well, if you'd rather that," Narcissa prodded her gently. "Come on, _please_. I need some new clothes."

"You got some earlier this year!" Bellatrix protested cracking open one eye.

"Yes but they don't, well, fit anymore."

"What do you mean they don't fit? You haven't gained weight or anything," Bellatrix frowned at her.

"I mean around my chest," Narcissa mumbled. "They're a bit tight."

Bellatrix blinked and her eyes darted to the chest in question then looked away, sitting up fast so that Narcissa had to move back before they bashed heads.

"Fine, but you'll have to pay for some of them," Bellatrix said finally avoiding her eyes.

"When would you like to go?" Narcissa asked and her hand accidently brushed Bellatrix's that was laying between them and Bellatrix jumped at the touch.

"Whenever," she said offhandedly and Narcissa saw her sister shiver.

"Bella?" she inched closer. "What's wrong? "

"It's nothing," Bellatrix closed her eyes and flinched as Narcissa pressed her hand on her shoulder. "Don't!"

"What is it?" Narcissa didn't move her hand but moved onto her knees so that she was before Bellatrix and bent down so that she could look at Bellatrix. "Do you feel sick?"

"Yes," Bellatrix mumbled, though Narcissa could barely hear her.

"We should go home, I can run and get help. I –"

"_No_," Bellatrix stressed eyes snapping open. "Just don't touch me."

Narcissa withdrew and waited, concern crossed over her face and she watched Bellatrix suck in a deep breath and rocked gently. After a few minutes Bellatrix stopped and cracked open her eyes to see Narcissa watching her with gentle eyes.

"I'm alright, Cissa. It's passed."

"Are you sure? I can still get help," Narcissa bit her lip.

Bellatrix suddenly laughed but it was hollow, "Believe me, no one can help me."

"I can," Narcissa approached but stopped short of touching her. "Tell me what to do and I'll do it."

Bellatrix gazed at her, lips slightly parted and in half-wonder at her sister's words then shook her dark head. "No, you couldn't help me."

"Why not?" Narcissa demanded. "I always help you when you have a, uh, turn."

That's what they called Bellatrix's drastic mood swings that sometimes gripped her. Their mother just got angry, not helping the situation and Andromeda chose to ignore her sister altogether. Their father was barely there and it was only Narcissa who went to help Bellatrix, indulging in her zealous moment as much as comforting her in her anger or pain. Bellatrix seemed to listen to her youngest sister and only she had some control over her dark sibling.

"This isn't that," Bellatrix lay her head against her knees, looking at Narcissa with haunted eyes.

"Please, let me help you," Narcissa cautiously took hold of her hand even though Bellatrix tried to pull away.

"You're not helping because you're the problem!" Bellatrix suddenly burst out and Narcissa recoiled as if stung.

"W-what?" she gasped as her sister got to her feet and paced around angrily.

"You heard me," Bellatrix snapped and Narcissa scrambled to her feet.

"Bella, what have I done?" Narcissa looked close to tears, the beautiful day shattering around her and Bellatrix stared at her. "I'm sorry if I have done something, _please_ Bella," she begged.

"You have no fucking idea," Bellatrix muttered darkly and started to storm off when Narcissa, in panic, grabbed her arm and Bellatrix whipped around and shoved Narcissa back against the tree. She was momentarily winded and gasped as Bellatrix pressed up against her.

"Bella!" she weakly tried to push her off. "I'm sorry Bella!"

"Shut up! Shut up!" Bellatrix shouted and then pressed her forehead against Narcissa's screwing her eyes shut. "Just shut up," she whispered. Narcissa remained silent though she trembled as she gently put her hands up to gently touch her face, softly stroking though Bellatrix tensed. She found that her sister always calmed down at her touch. Well, in the past anyway, today it seemed to make her recoil.

"You have no idea," Bellatrix murmured against her, nails digging into the bark by Narcissa's head. "No fucking idea."

"Tell me then so I understand," Narcissa whispered back. She cupped Bellatrix's face and Bellatrix looked at her, wild dark eyes that Narcissa drowned in.

"I can't," Bellatrix sounded pained. "I can't…"

"Please," Narcissa breathed and Bellatrix held her hands that were on her face, stilling them but didn't remove them. "I can help you, I promise."

Bellatrix made a sound and unexpectedly touched Narcissa's face, drawing her finger down her cheek then trailed off down her neck. Narcissa's heart hammered against her chest and she felt a thrill of some kind ripple through her, though she had no idea why. Bellatrix seemed to have some sort of trouble breathing, her breath coming out harder and Narcissa felt her own breath hitch.

"I promise to help you, no matter what," she said and that's when Bellatrix shuddered and seemed to give in to whatever it was that was causing her so much torment.

It shocked Narcissa what happened next, but more because of her own reaction. Bellatrix leaned in and pressed her lips against hers and that was Narcissa's first kiss. She felt her heart skip as Bellatrix moved her mouth against hers and what caused her to worry was the fact that she didn't push her away or tell her to stop. It was Bellatrix who stopped the kiss and looked aghast at what she had done.

"Bella," Narcissa stopped her from pulling away. "Stop, don't leave."

"What have I done?" Bellatrix was suddenly crying and Narcissa's heart ached, responding to her pain.

"Please, don't cry Bella," Narcissa soothed and held her close. Bellatrix cried and Narcissa felt her tears soak through her dress but that didn't bother her. "I liked it."

"What are you talking about?" Bellatrix gasped staring at her mouth wide open. "Are you insane?"

"I…" Narcissa flushed suddenly. "Is that what's troubling you?"

"How can you be so calm about this? Do you even realise how fucked up and twisted this is?" Bellatrix shouted and that made Narcissa pause. It was wrong, so incredibly wrong that if anyone found out… She shuddered to think of the consequences.

"I know," Narcissa whispered.

"I don't think you do," Bellatrix hissed. "You think it's alright for me to be lusting after you? Do you?"

Narcissa swallowed, "No… but I want to help you."

"What? Will you let me fuck you?"

Narcissa's eyes widened. She didn't even know how to do that with a man let alone a woman and although she was scared, the pain she saw in Bellatrix made her want to cry.

"N-no, I-," Narcissa babbled. "But you can kiss me."

Bellatrix just gaped at her. "You can't be serious!"

"I am," Narcissa touched her face. "I love you and now I know you love me too."

"This is sick, this love," Bellatrix said darkly but was soothed by Narcissa touching her face like that. "It's wrong and –"

Bellatrix never finished her sentence as Narcissa leaned up and kissed her into silence. Bellatrix struggled to get her off but Narcissa clung on and it wasn't long before Bellatrix wrapped her arms around her and kissed her back furiously. Narcissa felt some surprise when Bellatrix ran her tongue over her lips and slowly she opened her mouth, feeling that small thrill again as Bellatrix's tongue teased against her own.

"You've never been kissed before, have you?" Bellatrix asked huskily though she already knew the answer.

"No," Narcissa murmured feeling as if her heart was going to burst from her chest. "I liked it."

Bellatrix laughed darkly against her neck, "I'm sure, sweetling."

There was an odd tone to Bellatrix's voice but nothing more happened between them then. Narcissa held her and glanced up at the sky through the trees not caring that the bark had roughly scraped her skin. There were a few grey clouds now and she wondered where they came from, they were ruining the perfect sky.

When they set off back home it was late – later than they expected and Bellatrix didn't speak to Narcissa who tried to keep up with her sister's long strides. Unfortunately for them their mother was waiting and demanded to know where they went for all those hours.

"Out," Bellatrix muttered trying to head for the stairs.

"I don't recall giving you permission," their mother said coldly and stopped Bellatrix at the foot of the stairs. "Your hair is a mess and you have grass stains all over your dress. This is not how you were raised, to behave and look like those dirty Muggle children."

"Fuck off," Bellatrix said looking their mother directly in the eye. Narcissa gasped, her face looking as shocked as their mother's who, for a moment, stared at her daughter. Then she pulled herself together and grasped Bellatrix by the arm before turning to Narcissa.

"Go upstairs and you are not to come down until tomorrow evening, is that understood?"

Narcissa looked fearfully at Bellatrix and when their mother saw she gripped Bellatrix's arm harder making the girl wince.

"Am I understood?" she demanded again and Narcissa nodded fervently, having no choice but to do as her mother said. Bellatrix didn't look at her as she climbed the stairs and Narcissa thought her heart would break when she heard the stinging sound of a slap descend again and again. Crying she ran towards her room only to find Andromeda standing outside on the landing, listening. She glanced at Narcissa's appearance, from the tousled hair to the grass stains and shook her head slowly in despair.

"Why did you have to be so stupid?" she muttered. "Now we're all going to pay for _her_ mistakes."

"Shut up!" Narcissa quietly cried as they heard the muffled sound of whatever was going on downstairs. They were in the drawing room, Narcissa heard the familiar creak of the doors to confirm that. Her heart sunk to think of what her mother was doing to her sister. "Why do you always have to be so unkind to Bella? Can't you hear what mother is doing?"

"I can hear and I hate it but Bella should have held her tongue," Andromeda snapped. "You're both to blame."

Narcissa stared at her sister in disbelief. "We were only having fun! Away from here where we could be ourselves and have a nice day for once!"

"And what about me?"

Narcissa heard the resentment and felt a bit guilty for having laughed about Andromeda earlier and yet she couldn't help but think it was true. Andromeda would have never of gone swimming like they had or sunned themselves in just their underwear.

"You never want to come with us," Narcissa said as gently as possible.

"It's nice to be asked," Andromeda retorted.

"I'm sorry," Narcissa hung her head. "Next time, I promise."

Andromeda gave a shrug and in the silence they both listened. There were raised voices from below, their father was saying something and they could hear their mother reply angrily before storming out of the drawing room. Now that Bellatrix was alone with their father Narcissa's heart leapt in her chest and with good reason. He had never laid a hand or wand on either Andromeda or Narcissa but the sister's knew that he did with Bellatrix, though she never said a thing. Now they waited in a strung out silence until they heard a shriek and Narcissa burst into tears, her instinct telling her to go and help Bellatrix. Andromeda caught her by the wrist and the two of them struggled until Andromeda managed to pull Narcissa into her room.

"Are you insane? What are you going to do?" Andromeda hissed trying to keep her voice down.

"Help her! Can't you hear her?" Narcissa sat on her bed shaking and crying. "We have to help Bella."

"We can't! It will only be worse for her," Andromeda tried to comfort her but Narcissa backed away.

"So we just sit her and hear him hurt her?" Narcissa cried out and Andromeda clamped her hand across her mouth.

"Please Cissa shut up," there were tears in Andromeda's eyes too. "Please don't make it worse."

They both sat their apart crying until Andromeda stood and, wiping her tears, left Narcissa. By this time her head was throbbing and she lay down exhausted. Her beautiful day was ruined completely and all her thoughts were in turmoil. She touched her lips with her fingertips and she knew that this was definitely not the time to think about kissing but she did. The gravity of what they had done, of what _she_ had done, hit her then but mixed with the shame was that spark of deep-seated desire and love.

She fell asleep, her dreams a muddle of emotions and when she woke up saw that she had slept for a fair good couple of hours. It was now ten thirty and she slowly stripped out of her clothes and donned her nightdress. Carefully, she quietly tiptoed out of her room towards Bellatrix and knocked so very lightly before entering. Bellatrix lay on her bed, wide awake and still dressed. Her eyes were red from crying, her cheeks too baring the mark of their mother and from the way she lay, on her side rather than her back, Narcissa knew her father had done something to cause her more pain.

"Bella?" she whispered inching in and closed the door. Bellatrix didn't reply and seemed to stare right through her. Narcissa gently touched her shoulder and it was only then that Bellatrix acknowledged her.

"You should go," she said flatly but Narcissa was already unzipping her dress and like a mother undressing a child, she peeled off Bellatrix's clothes. She was right, her back was covered with thick red welts that would disappear by the next evening having be made by magic so they wouldn't leave a physical scar. Narcissa tried not to cry as she handed Bellatrix her nightgown and the two sisters lay on the bed face each other.

"I'm so sorry," Narcissa whispered for what seemed the hundredth time that day. Bellatrix didn't reply and Narcissa took a hold of her hand, kissing the fingers gently before moving onto her palm. Bellatrix eyed her but made no effort to stop her. "But thank you, we did have a good day."

"And I ruined it," Bellatrix muttered again in that flat tone.

"No," Narcissa shook her head against the pillow. "_They_ ruined it. You didn't ruin anything."

"I did," she looked so miserable then. "I ruined you."

"Hardly," Narcissa raised an eyebrow. "It was just a kiss."

Bellatrix sighed, "You are such a child."

"I'm not," Narcissa protested. "I know what I'm doing."

"No, you don't," Bellatrix sighed and closed her eyes. After a few minutes Narcissa asked what happened with their father but Bellatrix shook her head and repeated that, once more, it wasn't any of her business. Rather than start an argument, Narcissa slowly stroked her arm and shoulders, careful not to touch her back. Bellatrix leaned into the touch and reached out to hold Narcissa to her, arm wrapped around her waist.

"I really do love you Bella," Narcissa whispered and before she could protest, for the second time that day Narcissa kissed her sister to display her love.

"I wish you didn't," Bellatrix mumbled, kissing her cheeks, forehead and eventually lips. "I wish I didn't love you." Narcissa could taste the salty tears from them both and they clung shivering to each other.

"We need to stop this," Bellatrix tried to wriggle away but Narcissa had surprising strength to stop her.

"No," Narcissa pressed against her. "Because if we stop it means letting go and I will never let you go Bella, I'm always going to be here."

"Cissa," Bellatrix brushed her tears away and then her own. "Just go to sleep." Narcissa moved towards her but Bellatrix moved back. "In your own bed. If they found you…"

Narcissa's face fell but Bellatrix already turned over and quietly she sat up and left her room. In her own bed minutes later she sniffed and closed her eyes, recalling how they swam and laughed and all those sinful kisses that were only a small taste of what was to come.

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><p><strong>AN:** Next chapter should be up soon. Reviews are love :) x


	5. Chapter 5

**Title:** The Sweetest Poison in the Blood - Part V

**Author:** themirrorofsin

**Ship:** Bellatrix/Narcissa, with background Lucius/Narcissa, Bellatrix/Rodolphus

**Genre(s):** Romance/Hurt/Comfort

**Rating**: M/ NC 17

**Summary**: "_Shaking with aguish fear, and pain, she kissed and kissed her with a hungry mouth_."

**Warning:** Incest, sex, mentions of sex between minors, mentions of abuse, language.

Part V

While I am I, and you are you,

So long as the world contains us both,

Me the loving and you the loth

While the one eludes, must the other pursue.

- _Life in a Love_, Robert Browning

As it happened Bellatrix never took Narcissa shopping. Their mother separated them as much as possible since then and Bellatrix spent a lot of time with her father behind the locked doors of the drawing room. It was also obvious that Bellatrix was avoiding her. Every night that Narcissa went to her room she found the door locked. She rapped lightly against the door, whispered to her but Bellatrix didn't let her in. Narcissa even left her little notes but Bellatrix never replied to them.

However, still desperate for new clothes, their mother told Andromeda to take her and it was a rare occurrence for Narcissa to spend a whole day with her other sister. Unlike Bellatrix who didn't really care about money and gave most of it to Narcissa, Andromeda told her she had to buy her own clothes and anything else she needed. She wasn't being unkind but she too wanted to buy some new things, rarely getting the chance to get new robes.

They spent hours in Madam Malkin's with Narcissa trying on all different kinds of robes. Andromeda had been an easy customer finding her clothes quickly, Narcissa however was far more difficult. It was times like these that Bellatrix was the better sister to have who critically assessed her appearance and made her own suggestions. Andromeda just sat impatiently tapping her foot, barely glancing at Narcissa when she came out to show her how the robes were. Eventually Narcissa settled on one deep green and one emerald blue though she eyed the left over ones in disappointment. Andromeda dragged her into the bookstore where it was Narcissa's turn to wait for hours as her sister scanned the shelves. It was there that they bumped into Lucius Malfoy, the white-blond haired boy who was a year above her.

"Ah, the Black sisters," he smiled charmingly.

"Malfoy," Andromeda rolled her eyes.

"But you're missing one," he smirked. "Where's Bellatrix?"

"Home," Andromeda replied frostily. She hated everyone who associated themselves with Bellatrix's little group at school but Narcissa smiled back shyly at the handsome boy. He carried himself with an air of arrogance and sophistication which irritated Bellatrix but only because Bellatrix did the same.

"I thought she was supposed to meet us," he frowned. "She didn't say."

"Well, she can't come. You might as well slither back under the rock you came from," Andromeda snapped viciously.

"A pleasure as always," he said sarcastically as she pushed past him and stormed out. Narcissa hung back and Lucius smiled again. "Touché isn't she?"

"I think I annoyed her with how long I took at Madame Malkin's."

Lucius laughed and she blushed feeling rather ridiculous.

"Well, I'm not surprised," he said. "When you see your sister, tell her to send us an owl."

"About?"

"She'll know. Nice meeting you, I'll no doubt see you on the train," he said smoothly with another smile and swept past her. As Narcissa went outside she met her sister's angry look and sighed.

"He's such an arrogant bastard," Andromeda hissed tugging Narcissa down the street.

"He's nice to me," Narcissa said and Andromeda snorted.

"Fishing after Bellatrix, like the rest of them."

"What do you mean?"

"Their little group is nothing but trouble. They are dangerous," Andromeda warned. "You stay away from them."

"Bellatrix will never harm me," Narcissa said confidently. Not after telling her that she loved her, she thought.

"You think," Andromeda pushed the door to a small café where they were stopping for lunch. "She will, one day, she will."

Narcissa shrugged and followed her sister inside. For the thousandth time that day Narcissa wanted it to be Bellatrix with her. When they returned home Andromeda took herself up to her room and Narcissa walked through the house and eventually found Bellatrix in the parlour. She didn't look up as Narcissa put down her bags or when she went to sit opposite her at the table. This was the closest they had been in weeks and completely alone too.

"Bella?"

"What?" Bellatrix still didn't look up from the book she was reading.

"Aren't you interested in what I brought?" she asked hoping that she would get Bellatrix's attention.

"Not particularly," Bellatrix muttered turning the page.

"Please look, I brought them thinking of you and what colours you like," she said softly and that made Bellatrix pause, her eyes flicked up and Narcissa saw her hands clench.

"Fine," she said roughly and with a sunny smile, Narcissa opened her bags and brought out the robes and Bellatrix gave a nod of approval.

"I also brought you something," Narcissa rummaged around in her bag and then produced a small little black box and pushed it towards her sister. Bellatrix stared at it and then back to Narcissa who urged her to open it.

Bellatrix's eyes widened as she stared at the necklace she found inside. A silver pendant in the shape of a bird's skull, the beak pointed like a claw. It wasn't the most beautiful thing in the world but upon seeing it Narcissa knew she had to buy it for Bellatrix. Her sister took it out and held it before her admiring it and, for the first time in weeks, smiled at Narcissa.

"Do you like it?" Narcissa asked nervously. "I saw it and I just thought-"

"I do, like it, I mean," Bellatrix carefully fastened it around her neck. It hung just above her breasts, the metal cold against her skin and she touched it gently. "I won't take it off."

Narcissa flushed prettily and reached across the table to hold Bellatrix's hand and gave it a small squeeze. "It suits you."

"Though you shouldn't have," Bellatrix said absentmindedly stroking Narcissa's knuckles with her thumb.

Narcissa shrugged, "I wanted to."

"Thanks," Bellatrix smiled lightly.

"Oh," Narcissa remembered. "We bumped into Lucius Malfoy."

"Malfoy?" Bellatrix's smile faded. "What did he want?"

"He said for you to send an owl… you were supposed to meet them?" Narcissa looked at her curiously seeing Bellatrix's free hand fist. "Bella? Why were you supposed to meet him and the others?"

"We were just supposed to meet up before school," Bellatrix muttered.

"I thought you hated Lucius," Narcissa prodded lightly.

"I do," Bellatrix removed her hand and closed the book that was open on her lap. "Did you say anything to him, like why I can't go?"

Narcissa shook her head and that reassured Bellatrix though her sister now looked thoughtful and stood to pace. Andromeda's words came back to Narcissa as she glanced at the title of the book Bellatrix had been studying so thoroughly, _The Darks Arts: Spells and Curses Volume 1_. Her sister was ignoring her and Narcissa glanced at Bellatrix before thumbing through the pages until she got to where Bellatrix had stopped reading. The book talked about spells used to harm others without leaving a trace and Narcissa had barely finished reading the first spell before Bellatrix's hands slammed down and yanked the book away from her.

"What do you think you are doing?" Bellatrix yelled and Narcissa jumped.

"I was just –"

"Snooping! Must you always touch my things?" Bellatrix clutched the book to her chest. "You have no right!"

"I was just reading, I'm sorry," Narcissa apologised but Bellatrix glared at her.

"You will not tell anyone about this understood?"

"But Bella, those spells… The horrid things they do –"

"Just forget them, pretend you never saw them," Bellatrix told her still fuming. "Promise me."

"I promise," Narcissa mumbled miserably and her sister marched out leaving her sitting there confused and upset.

Later that night as Narcissa lay in her bed trying to sleep but kept thinking about her sister and that book until a soft knock came at her door. Her heart fluttered but she didn't get up, waiting till she heard it again and this time Bellatrix's voice came faintly through the wooden door.

"Cissa, open up," she whispered and Narcissa bit her lip. "Please Cissa, let me in."

Narcissa was half tempted to leave her there, just like she had done to her all those weeks back but she felt a small panic when she heard Bellatrix start to retreat. Jumping out of bed she opened her door and Bellatrix turned around from where she was heading back to her room. Narcissa opened the door wider and Bellatrix came back and, making sure the door was shut, they sat on Narcissa's bed with one small candle burning. Narcissa noticed with some delight that Bellatrix was still wearing her necklace and slowly her anger faded.

"I'm sorry for looking at your book," she started and Bellatrix inclined her head.

"I'm sorry for shouting." Bellatrix pulled up her knees to her chest. "I didn't want you to see that."

"Those spells… Bella they are horrid," Narcissa told her.

"I know," Bellatrix said without any feeling in her voice.

"But how can you read that?" she shuddered and Bellatrix gave a small shrug. "Who gave you that book?"

"It doesn't matter. Just forget it like I told you to."

"You keep saying it doesn't matter or that it's none of my business," Narcissa scowled at her and pulled up the covers to her chin.

"And I'm right," Bellatrix traced patterns across the bed sheets. "This really doesn't concern you."

Narcissa huffed and wriggled down the bed and turned on her side. Bellatrix sighed and moved up the bed to sit beside her and touched her shoulder.

"Haven't you noticed?" she asked and Narcissa glanced back with a frown.

"What?"

"Two things; one that I'm wearing your necklace and two, I haven't had a turn, a proper one, for a couple of weeks now."

Narcissa couldn't stop her small smile and she turned back to her sister. "I noticed."

Bellatrix interlaced her fingers with Narcissa's and leaned above her making Narcissa's heart beat faster and she saw that familiar gleam in her eyes.

"I thought you might, you always notice things like that," Bellatrix murmured. "I have missed you."

"I have been here," Narcissa whispered licking her suddenly dry lips. "_You_ avoided _me_."

Bellatrix shook her head, rubbing her forehead against the pillow Narcissa lay on. "I was trying to stay away from you, yes. I didn't want too but I had to. This is fucking with my head, wanting you and feeling disgusted with myself."

Narcissa's heart was thundering and with her free hand slowly ran her fingers down Bellatrix's back making her sister sigh contentedly. Narcissa understood her sister perfectly, the exact same thoughts and emotions had been running riot in her as well. She was painfully aware of how little she did know about intimate relations between people. She had learnt the very bare basics but little about the pleasure that people sought. She knew of homosexuality but it was something that her family viewed as an atrocity, the same way incest was. Even though there were more than a few questionable relationships within their family, Narcissa knew. To keep bloodlines pure it seemed that some murky marriages had emerged and there were whispers of darker tales within the Ancient and Most Noble House of Black.

"Tell me to leave," Bellatrix pleaded in a whisper against her ear. "Tell me to stop."

"Bella," Narcissa held her. "I will never tell you to leave me."

Bellatrix crushed her lips against hers and it was a hard kiss, not like any of the ones before but Narcissa didn't turn away. Even when Bellatrix bit her lip and drew blood, she kissed her back with all the passion her eleven year old self could muster. Bellatrix looked at her guiltily as she wiped her lips but neither of them spoke about it. Once or twice Bellatrix tried to explain but words failed her and soon she realised Narcissa understood and no words were necessary. They never were between them.

/x/

The summer holidays were all but over, September loomed in and Narcissa looked forward to starting her second year at Hogwarts. She'd be away from her parents and be with Bellatrix. As they arrived onto the platform and the Hogwarts Express gleamed brightly she slipped her hand into Bellatrix's. Bellatrix considered letting go but then tugged her hand and got into an empty carriage. For the rest of the year they danced this dangerous dance of a few kisses here and there. They argued a lot more, started mainly by Bellatrix who tried but failed miserably to stop herself from what came, almost chillingly, naturally to her.

Narcissa had her own demons to fight when she turned twelve. The girls around her talked about boys and of innocent kisses whilst she struggled to understand what was happening between herself and her sister. In her mind they weren't really lovers because they didn't have sex but nor were their kisses innocent or was Narcissa's ache to touch her sister. She played with idea of being a lesbian, yet the thought of kissing other girls did not have the same effect on her as the thought of kissing Bellatrix did. Also she was becoming slightly more aware of boys and realising that they started to look at her.

She once told Bellatrix this when they had some time alone and wandered Hogwarts looking for a private area. Bellatrix gave her a look that she didn't comprehend and told her boys were bound to look at her – she was beautiful after all.

"Really?" Narcissa looked unsure and Bellatrix told her not to play stupid. "I'm not!"

"Of course you're beautiful, idiot," Bellatrix sighed. "Too beautiful I think."

"Boys look at you all the time," Narcissa chimed in and Bellatrix raised her eyebrow. "I've heard them talk about you too."

"I'm sure," Bellatrix laughed ruffling Narcissa's hair which irked her.

"You do like boys, don't you?" Narcissa pried carefully as to avoid offending her sister. But Bellatrix was in a nonchalant mood and merely shrugged as she answered.

"Sometimes."

"Sometimes?" Narcissa echoed.

"Depends on my mood," Bellatrix smirked and Narcissa's heart flipped. "Though I don't like them nearly as much as I like you."

Narcissa laughed but it was a little nervous. She didn't mind Bellatrix flirting with her, kissing her and although she never touched her in certain places, Bellatrix would press her body against her fully so that when she moved, Narcissa felt it. Lately Bellatrix's flirtation was becoming more seductive, her eyes glittered and they were edging towards no-man's land.

"Lighten up Cissa," Bellatrix chided as she saw her sister's eyes dart around. "I'm not going to _do_ anything. I'm not completely insane. Yet," she added after a seconds pause.

"You're not insane," Narcissa said automatically and relaxed when she realised that she was being silly to think Bellatrix might risk kissing her in such an open place.

"You're the only one who thinks that," Bellatrix leaned back against the tree trunk. "I think mother and father want to send me to some asylum and brick me in."

"Don't!" Narcissa wailed. "I hate it when you speak like this!"

Bellatrix only laughed at her and then pulled from her robes a packet of cigarettes that Narcissa gasped at.

"Bellatrix! You can't!"

"Shush Narcissa," Bellatrix frowned and lit up. "I'm only going to smoke one."

"Where did you get them from? I didn't even know you smoked!" Narcissa lowered her voice and looked around once more.

"I started this year," Bellatrix blew out the smoke and Narcissa watched it turn from pink to blue to green. "It was Lestrange who gave these to me. Brought them from Hungary I think. Pretty isn't it? Better than what those filthy Muggles smoke anyway."

"Rodolphus Lestrange? I thought you hated him as well?" Narcissa picked up the packet and looked at the label but it was all in Hungarian.

"Cissa, what you have to learn is that I hate a lot of people and I'm pretty sure a lot of people hate me. But to get on in the world you have to be around people you hate," she smirked then. "That is until you can get rid of them once they have served their purpose."

"Get rid of them?" a shiver ran down Narcissa's spine. "Bella…"

"Don't go _on_ Cissa," Bellatrix scowled and then stubbed out the cigarette and stood. "Look, in this life you're going to find that trust – that unbreakable, unwavering trust – is rare, incredibly rare and so is love. If you're lucky enough to find someone you trust and love like that then I think you're the luckiest person on earth. But most of the time you're going to find yourself surrounded by people you hate."

"I trust and love you," Narcissa whispered gazing up at her and Bellatrix held her gaze for a few moments before she looked away.

"I know, and I fear that more than anything."

"Do you trust me?" Narcissa asked knowing already that Bellatrix loved her. She dreaded the answer but Bellatrix smiled softly.

"More than anything."

Narcissa took her sister's had that she offered to help her up and Narcissa wholeheartedly believed that with her sister there, nothing could go wrong. In a world and life full of chaos, Bellatrix would remain the only constant thing there to ground her.

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><p><strong>AN:** thanks for all the kind comments :) Next chapter will be up soon!


	6. Chapter 6

**Title:** The Sweetest Poison in the Blood - Part VI

**Author:** themirrorofsin

**Ship:** Bellatrix/Narcissa, with background Lucius/Narcissa, Bellatrix/Rodolphus

**Genre(s):** Romance/Hurt/Comfort

**Rating**: M/ NC 17

**Summary**: "_Shaking with aguish fear, and pain, she kissed and kissed her with a hungry mouth_."

**Warning:** Incest, sex, mentions of sex between minors, mentions of abuse, language, self-harm.

Part VI

…Again and again…because those

I care for best, do me

Most harm…

- Sappho

1968

It was her third year at Hogwarts and Bellatrix's last. That alone was a catalyst for their sudden and unanimous decision to start exploring a little further with each other. Narcissa took to lightly touching her sister through her clothes or over her underwear. She liked to feel all of Bellatrix's curves above her, underneath her and Bellatrix no longer kissed just her lips or face but descended to trail down her neck, across her shoulders and collarbone. She also kissed her stomach and thighs but nothing more. At least not until Narcissa nudged her one day from where they were hidden away in a dingy room in the Hog's Head where no one would look for them or ask too many questions.

"What?" Bellatrix asked lifting her head from where it lay on her stomach. Narcissa had her shirt off, exposing her stomach and bra-covered breasts whilst Bellatrix had taken her dress off and lay with just her underwear. Narcissa noticed how her sister's choice in undergarments favoured, what seemed to be, just scraps of black lace and silk. Barely anything was hidden from sight and Bellatrix had insisted buying Narcissa her own sensual underwear, wrinkling her nose at the child-like and innocent ones Narcissa had owned.

"You're barely a child now," she said brazenly at her causing Narcissa to blush hard.

Now Narcissa wore the dark green set that Bellatrix had given her as a birthday present and was by far her favourite, as well as the colour Bellatrix liked best on her.

"I…" she blushed and Bellatrix raised her eyebrow. "I want to touch you."

Bellatrix stilled and her eyes flitted up to gaze back at Narcissa who was still blushing.

"You are touching me," she said, her voice a little strange.

"Not properly," Narcissa breathed and wriggled up into a sitting position. Bellatrix eyed her wearily, rolling onto her side and propped herself up on her elbow.

"How then?"

"You know," Narcissa lowered her eyes.

"If you want to do it then you have to say it," Bellatrix argued and Narcissa swallowed hard.

"I-I want to touch you, without your bra," Narcissa mumbled and Bellatrix had to smile at how hard her little sister was blushing. Slowly she sat up as well and unhooked her bra carefully, Narcissa watching beneath her lashes. Her heart was thumping hard and she had to swallow again, her mouth dry and throat thick. Bellatrix lay back down on her back and cautiously Narcissa moved forward and trailed her fingertips, so lightly Bellatrix hardly felt her, down her throat and then slowly traced the curve of one full, pert breast. Her touch was measured and explored lazily watching Bellatrix drag in a breath as she touched her now hard nipple. She repeated the same attention onto the other one and was fascinated by how beautiful her sister was and told her so.

"Really?" she tried to sound as if she didn't care but Narcissa knew she did. Bellatrix lay still, letting her sister touch her though her touch was too light for it to be anything but teasing. Eventually as Narcissa's hand swept over her stomach Bellatrix stopped her and Narcissa looked at her questioningly. Bringing her hand back up to her breast, Bellatrix showed her how she liked to be touched and Narcissa, excited by the thought of bringing pleasure to her sister, was quick to learn – something that Bellatrix appreciated.

"Narcissa," she sighed, eyes half closed and arched her back. Then with a wicked smile she slid her arms up and around Narcissa, unhooking her bra. Narcissa gasped as it came off and tried to cover herself with her arms but Bellatrix, rather roughly, pulled her hands down and looked at her, head cocked to the side. After a long moment sat up and leaned in, kissing her languidly and deeply. Narcissa forgot her shyness but gasped again as their breasts brushed and sent shivers across her body. Bellatrix laughed into her mouth, her own hands now touching her exposed skin. She lightly pinched Narcissa's nipple making her squirm and moan at the same time.

"Bella," she pressed their bodies closer but then glanced at the clock on the wall and yanked back. "Bella! We have to go!"

"What?" Bellatrix looked perplexed and then looked at the clock as well. "Shit, shit, shit!"

"Exactly!" Narcissa fished around for her bra and shirt whilst Bellatrix yanked on her bra and tried to zip up her dress but got frustrated and nearly ripped it.

"Fuck!" she shouted and Narcissa ran towards her and helped. They scrambled the rest of their stuff and ran out, quickly making their way back to Hogwarts before the curfew was up. Thankfully it was Professor Slughorn and they both made their simpering excuses of being held up in the toilets, having female problems which made the professor stammer and send them on their way. Narcissa giggled as they went back to the Slytherin common room, both of them feeling elated from the rush. Bellatrix had to be careful since she was already on far too many warnings to risk any more detentions. The only detention Narcissa had so far was when she had snuck out one night with Bellatrix and had unfortunately been caught just on their way back.

A few heads turned as the girls burst in and Andromeda looked up and upon seeing them, flushed and giggling, she rolled her eyes and focused again on her book. Lucius Malfoy raised one eyebrow but no one said anything. They were more than used to seeing the two Black girls together all the time, day and night. Bellatrix was completely possessive of her sister and everyone knew not to bother Narcissa in fear of having to deal with her sister. Narcissa too clung to her sister and rarely left her side unless it was for classes or when Bellatrix spent time with her group. When that took place Narcissa wasn't allowed anywhere near them which annoyed her no end.

"Why can't I come?" Narcissa stamped her foot as Bellatrix brushed her dark hair in front of the mirror the next evening.

"Because it's not for you," Bellatrix sighed and then picked up her wand.

"But you let Lucius hang around!" Narcissa protested slumping on her sister's bed.

"I don't want him there but the others do," Bellatrix glanced at her. "Pout all you want you're not coming. End of discussion."

"I hate you," Narcissa said sourly and Bellatrix raised an eyebrow.

"I'm sure," she drawled and left, barely missed being hit by a pillow that Narcissa threw across the dorm room. Later that night when Bellatrix came back and snuck in, Narcissa pretend to be asleep and Bellatrix sighed, going to her own bed and pulled the curtains across tightly.

/x/

Two weeks before they broke up for Christmas Bellatrix got another detention. This time for hexing a boy a year below her near the library. Bellatrix insisted that she had been provoked and had rightfully defended herself and rumours flew wildly around. As punishment for putting the boy in hospital for a couple of days she was to stack all the returned books in the library without magic. The whole day until it was time for her to go to her detention, Bellatrix had been in an incredibly foul mood. She spent most of it with some of her group and Narcissa partly avoided her. Not that Bellatrix wanted her around either, snapping at her when Narcissa asked to borrow some parchment.

However when Bellatrix went Narcissa decided to wait for her to come back, curled up in the large armchair that faced the fire. She tried to read but the words weren't making sense and the lines kept merging. Finally she closed the book and thought about the rumour that was circling. It was a rumour that struck her heart because if it was true… she couldn't bear to think about it. She knew her sister had a rather casual attitude to sex and she wasn't naive to thinking it was just limited to boys.

But if it was true, that the boy had argued with Bellatrix because she was having sex with his sister, it made Narcissa want to cry and scream. She couldn't stand to think of Bellatrix with another girl, doing more than what she did with her. It made her stomach churn with jealousy and anger.

Finally Bellatrix came in just before curfew and jumped when she saw Narcissa sit up. Hands pressed over her leaping heart she glared at her sister, grumbling how she nearly gave her a heart attack. "What are you doing up?"

"I waited for you," Narcissa shifted on her feet and Bellatrix noticed both her hesitation and the fact she didn't look her in the eye. Narcissa looked at her sister critically and she looked pale, her face pinched and she grimaced.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing. Why did you wait for me?"

"I…" Narcissa felt her stomach turn. "I heard some boys talking… is it true, what they say, that you hexed that boy because he asked if you were sleeping with his brother?"

Bellatrix's mouth parted in shock and Narcissa saw a flicker of panic in her eyes before she clenched her fists.

"Who said that?" she demanded but Narcissa shook her head.

"I don't know, I didn't see them. Is it true?"

"No," Bellatrix said and the obvious lie hurt Narcissa.

"You're lying!" she felt like bursting into tears and stamping her foot in frustration. "It is true, you are sleeping with other people!"

"Shut up!" Bellatrix clamped her hand over Narcissa's mouth. "Do you want everyone to hear?"

Narcissa wrenched herself away and tears pricked her eyes painfully. She couldn't believe it… in her mind she saw Bellatrix kissing a nameless boy, her hands all over the their body and she thought she was going to be sick. She swayed and Bellatrix grasped her elbow, forcing her to sit down.

"Narcissa? What's wrong?" she bent down but Narcissa pulled her hands away before Bellatrix could touch her again.

"Sick," she mumbled and then looked at Bellatrix's face looking at her. "I feel sick. _How could you?_"

Bellatrix bristled but had the grace to flush. "It's nothing, really Narcissa, it was nothing."

"How can it be nothing?" she cried quietly, covering her face with one hand. "How can you do that? You tell me that love me but you go off with others?"

"One person," Bellatrix corrected and Narcissa glared at her.

"That makes no difference!" she tried to wipe her tears away but they kept coming.

Narcissa shuddered, "I thought it was just me."

"Cissa," Bellatrix reached out for her and although Narcissa tried to pull away she latched on tightly. "It_ is_ only you. I love you – I love you more than anything. You _know_ that."

"Then why?" she whispered brokenly. "Why?"

Bellatrix didn't reply for a moment and her eyes looked distantly into the low burning fire. She was looking for words that couldn't being to explain why she did certain things. But seeing Narcissa weeping made her try to sort out the confusion in her head.

"I can't explain it. It's just happened… I needed to feel something and he was there…" she trailed off. "When I have sex I feel fine, good even… that or violence. Sometimes both."

"Bella," Narcissa gazed at her trembling a little. "Bella, you're getting worse."

She sighed and ran her hand through her hair. "Depends, most of the time I have some control but recently…" she frowned. "I think I know why."

"Why?" Narcissa could scarcely breathe.

"You know too," Bellatrix held her gaze. "Because of what we have been doing… it leaves me wanting and because I can't have you I get so frustrated and angry."

Narcissa swallowed, heart fluttering at her sister's admission. This, whatever it was between them, seemed to infringe on everything they did, whether they were separate or together. Everything reverted back to them in the end. A tiny part of her hated it because everything seemed to be getting so complicated.

"Then have me," Narcissa breathed, reaching out to take Bellatrix's hand in her own. "Take all of me."

Bellatrix gasped but then pulled away from her and stood. "No, I can't. We're already going far enough…"

"But I want you too," Narcissa maintained getting to her feet as well following Bellatrix around the room. "If it will stop you going to others… I want it too."

"You can't possibly know what you want! You're just a child!" Bellatrix sneered backing away from her. Narcissa knew Bellatrix well to know when Bellatrix would turn nasty in order to push her away. In the past it had worked but that was until Narcissa had realised that she didn't mean it. Now she just let Bellatrix say things and gently persisted in both calming her and assuring her.

"Bellatrix, I only want you."

"You are so stupid and ridiculous! You don't know anything about sex or have any real grasp on what we are doing!" she fumed but found herself backed against the wall and Narcissa leaned into her. "Don't!" she looked fearfully around but no one was there and Narcissa did nothing more than hover her face inches before her sister's. They were breathing hard and Narcissa saw Bellatrix's eyes dart to her mouth and lick her own lips nervously. It wasn't the first time that Narcissa had seen her sister anxious, the fear of being caught was a consistent worry to her.

"You're right, I don't know anything about sex. But I _do_ want you Bella, I want you more than anyone else."

"I can't Narcissa," Bellatrix whispered painfully. "You're too young."

"How old were you?"

Bellatrix hesitated then admitted, "Fourteen."

Narcissa raised her eyebrow, "Really?"

"Yes," Bellatrix gently pushed her back. "See, _too young_."

"Just a year," she stepped back but entwined their fingers. "I'm here Bella, you don't need to look elsewhere."

"Narcissa…"

"Please," she looked heartbroken. "Promise me you won't go with anyone else. _Please_."

"I promise," Bellatrix said but they both heard the hollow words.

"I'm always here," Narcissa whispered and let her hand go.

Bellatrix didn't speak and Narcissa left her sadly, going up to bed. Bellatrix sank against the wall and pulled her legs up groaning, digging her fingers into her shins. The shots of pain that she felt helped and she took deep breaths trying to hold back from lashing out. But it wasn't enough and she took out her wand and muttering a spell, she felt her arm sting and blood slowly trickle out of the cut. It was sufficient for now, it wasn't deep enough to become life threatening but it hurt and she fed off the pain.

How long she sat there she didn't know but then she heard a distant chiming of the clock and shakily got to her feet. Her gaze swam momentarily and stumbled up to the dormitory and slump onto her bed fully clothed. Her arm hurt a lot but she had dropped her wand and couldn't move to get it. She felt lifeless and she felt as if she was falling down into some abyss and she could only call out Narcissa's name before she was swallowed by the dark and her cries were smothered.

"Bella?" Narcissa's voice was barely a whisper as she shook her sister who grumbled. It was still dark, Narcissa was only awake because she heard Bellatrix call for her. "Bella are you awake?"

"What does it look like?" Bellatrix mumbled, rubbing her eyes then winced at the pain from her arm.

Narcissa didn't see that, fortunately, and she climbed in to lie face to face in her bed.

"You're still dressed," she whispered as her arm brushed against her. "What's wrong with you?"

"Nothing, I'm fine."

"You called out to me," she said lowly and Bellatrix turned her head away, moving onto her back. "Why?"

"I don't know," Bellatrix whispered, her body trembled. "I thought… I thought you could…"

"I could?"

"Help me," Bellatrix let out and Narcissa' heart clenched and she moved closer.

"I want to help you Bella," she found her hand beneath the covers. She was cold and Narcissa rubbed her skin in hope to warm her up. "You just have to tell me how."

"I don't know," she said sounding so broken it made Narcissa want to cry. "I don't know how."

Bellatrix turned to her but didn't kiss her, their mouths hovering over each other's. In the end Bellatrix lay her head against Narcissa's shoulder and Narcissa sighed softly, turning her head away to discreetly wipe a tear away.


	7. Chapter 7

**Title:** The Sweetest Poison in the Blood - Part VII

**Author:** themirrorofsin

**Ship:** Bellatrix/Narcissa, with background Lucius/Narcissa, Bellatrix/Rodolphus

**Genre(s):** Romance/Hurt/Comfort

**Rating**: M/ NC 17

**Summary**: "_Shaking with aguish fear, and pain, she kissed and kissed her with a hungry mouth_."

**Warning:** Incest, sex, mentions of sex between minors, mentions of abuse, language, self-harm.

Part VII

I remembered you with my soul clenched

in that sadness of mine that you know.

- Clenched Soul, Pablo Neruda

1968 - Christmas

The holidays started off miserably with none of the sisters talking to each other. Narcissa was withdrawn, still feeling betrayed and Andromeda and Bellatrix had argued once more on the train home. Their mother was in a bad mood with them as well, demanding to know the circumstances for Bellatrix's behaviour at school. When Bellatrix failed to give a proper answer, infuriating their mother, she was sent to their father. Once more Narcissa sat at the top of the stairs with her heart breaking as she heard the muffled sobs come from inside the drawing room. Then, when the door opened she careful crept halfway down the stairs and she saw their father stride out tucking his wand away. She stood waiting, and was about to move again when she saw her mother go towards the drawing room.

She watched as her mother went in then moments later emerged with Bellatrix. Narcissa stood back on the stairs but her mother barely gave her a glance as she squeezed past her, helping her oldest daughter up the steps. Bellatrix's face was pale, her eyes glazed and she just let herself be led. Narcissa watched as their mother put Bellatrix to bed and then walk out onto the landing. This time she paused and mother and daughter stared at one another. Whatever her mother saw in Narcissa's eyes, it made her raise her chin slightly and proceeded to go back downstairs without a word. Narcissa waited until she heard her mother reach the last step before opening the door to her sister's room.

She didn't, however, go and lay beside her like she done before. She stood in the doorway for a couple of minutes, watching Bellatrix's body rise and fall with her every breath. She lay with her back to her and Narcissa didn't move to see if she was awake or not. She turned to leave, thinking that for a moment she heard a stifled sob escape from her sister as she closed the door.

/x/

The next morning was dreary and cold, a grim start Narcissa thought as she wandered downstairs to the kitchen. Andromeda looked exhausted and was huddled up in a large jumper whilst reading the _Prophet_. Narcissa blinked in some surprised that Bellatrix was down. Normally she was a late rises but this morning Bellatrix sat quietly at the table in her nightdress, picking at a piece of toast. She also didn't think that her sister would have come down after yesterday. The other two sisters were more than aware of the slight tension that radiated off of their eldest sister but said nothing. Their parents were out, a note being left with a house-elf and they were all silently relieved. Narcissa helped herself some toast and then, to lighten the mood, said that it was five days till Christmas. Andromeda smiled lightly, saying how she had had such a hard time finding a present for Bellatrix and her. Narcissa tried to ask her to give her a hint to what it was but Andromeda shook her head with a small laugh.

"Have you got all your presents yet, Bella?" Andromeda asked her sister who blankly looked back at them.

"Seems pointless to do so."

Narcissa pouted, "So you haven't got me anything?"

Bellatrix turned her head and stared out of the window at the bleak sky and muttered something about everything being pointless. Narcissa exchanged a look with Andromeda who gave a small shrug when suddenly Bellatrix slammed her hands against the table. The air was so tense and they saw Bellatrix tremble, her mood changed from vacant to violent in seconds.

"Bellatrix…" Andromeda said tentatively but Bellatrix wasn't listening and stormed off upstairs. They heard her door slam, minutes of tense silence fell and then the sound of breaking glass and Andromeda got to her feet. Narcissa was already running up the stairs and Andromeda pushed past her, shoving open Bellatrix's door. They both felt their heart's stop as they saw the broken mirror and Bellatrix sitting on the splintered glass, clutching some shards in her hands. She was bleeding and Narcissa saw in horror as Bellatrix dragged a piece of mirror across her legs, blood seeping out rapidly. Andromeda gasped and rushed to her sister but Bellatrix shoved her off yet Andromeda persisted and swept as much as the glass away from her.

"Get some towels!" she shouted at Narcissa who stood shaking. Narcissa ran and grabbed two fresh towels from the bathroom and ran back. Her stomach churned as she saw all the blood covering Bellatrix's white nightdress. Andromeda had pulled Bellatrix to sit on the end of her bed and grabbed the towel from Narcissa's hands try to wrap it around Bellatrix's hand. Narcissa drabbed at the wound on her sister's right leg whilst Andromeda tried to get Bellatrix's attention.

"Open your hand Bellatrix," she commanded but Bellatrix didn't seem to hear her. Her eyes looked unfocused and she sat numbly with her fist clenched, blood running down. "Please Bellatrix!"

Andromeda tried to pry open her hand but it was no use. Narcissa stood and touched Bellatrix's face gently, bending down placing herself in front of where Bellatrix's gaze seemed to be.

"Bella, please," she whispered stroking her face. "Open your hand."

She kept murmuring to her, caressing her face and neck and Andromeda stared at her sisters, seeing Bellatrix begin to pull out of her trance. Bellatrix looked up at Narcissa who smiled shakily. Narcissa put her hand over Bellatrix's and slowly Bellatrix opened her hand and Andromeda gently brushed the glass out and made sure there was none left. Bellatrix tried to pull her hand away but Narcissa told her to keep still and just look at her and Bellatrix did that reluctantly.

Andromeda told her to keep her calm whilst she ran downstairs to find the small bottle of Essence of Dittany that was kept in the emergency box. Narcissa stroked through Bellatrix's hair and waited for Andromeda to come back. When she did she knelt by Bellatrix's legs and moved the towel that was there to stop the bleeding. Narcissa knelt next to her sister on the bed and kept murmuring to her as Andromeda put a few drops on the cut. Bellatrix jerked, moving her legs but Andromeda caught her feet and held her still, watching the skin close up.

Doing her hands was far more difficult and Bellatrix howled when Andromeda tried to put it onto the wounds and Narcissa had to take over even though her sister was sobbing in pain.

"Just a little bit… nearly done," Narcissa tried to reassure her though she felt a tear escape her. It wasn't just physical pain, she was tormented internally and the two sisters had no idea how to help her. Eventually it was over and bandaged up, Narcissa cradled her sister's head against her breasts, stroking her hair. She didn't notice Andromeda pick up the bloody towels and scoop up some of the glass on the floor. A house-elf was called to clean the rest and Andromeda cast a look back.

Bellatrix was weeping against her sister and Narcissa looked over her head. A look passed between the two sisters then Andromeda left, closing the door quietly. Narcissa focused all her attention on Bellatrix who eventually stopped crying and sighed against her, clinging to her as if Narcissa would let her go.

She bit her lip, wondering if she should change Bellatrix out of her nightdress that was stained with her blood and then she quickly did before Bellatrix fell asleep, drained from all the emotion. She barely glanced at her body, only lingering on her arms noticing small white scars on the pale skin. She covered Bellatrix over and left her room. She let out a deep breath and only then noticed that she had some of Bellatrix's blood on her dress and across her arms. She could barely move and had to drag herself into the bathroom, fumbling with the taps. The water was hot and burnt her but she barely noticed. She scrubbed hard at the blood and watched the water turn a pale pink as it went down the drain. She washed her face and stared at her reflection in the mirror.

So pale and tired, she thought. Steeling her shoulders she made her way back downstairs, trying to continue with her breakfast but everything just tasted like ash and she could only sip at a cup of tea.

Andromeda came down, changed but pale and they sat in silence, each too busy with her own turbulent thoughts to talk. They were left shaken and subdued after that act of self-inflicted violence and when their parents returned home later that evening, Narcissa quietly informed them that Bellatrix indisposed due to stomach cramps. Their father raised his eyebrow and walked into his study and their mother just told her coldly to go back upstairs and tell Bellatrix to just bare the pain.

Narcissa crept into Bellatrix's room and found that Andromeda was there. She rose a little for her chair by the desk thinking it was their mother. Narcissa shook her head and went to sit next to Bellatrix on the bed. Bellatrix, curled up with eyes closed and silent, looked so much like a hurt child that they were reminded how young she actually was. She noticed that Andromeda had removed the broken mirror and she was thankful that her sister had thought ahead. Andromeda was shaken by the way Bellatrix snapped and asked if she had been like this before.

Narcissa smoothed Bellatrix's hair back as she quietly replied, "Sort of… not like that with the glass and blood."

"I see."

The tone in her sister's voice made her look up, "What?"

Andromeda watched her wearily, deciding on whether to tell her or not and then sighed. "Have you noticed, the small scars on her arms and legs?"

Narcissa's brow furrowed but she didn't play ignorant. "Yes."

"You know she does that, right?"

Narcissa sat there, suddenly feeling nervous as to where the conversation was heading. Even if no one had told her, she already knew that Bellatrix hurt herself. She had seen her scratch at her arms a couple of times and dig her nails into her skin.

"Yes, I know," she whispered, voice wavering and Andromeda looked down at her lap. Silence descended for a while, Narcissa swallowed and tried not to look at Bellatrix and imagine her sitting there, bleeding and perversely enjoying it.

"How do you do it?"

"Do what?" she looked up.

"Bare it all," Andromeda glanced at Bellatrix.

"Because she's my sister. I'd do anything for her," Narcissa smiled softly despite the situation. "And she'd do anything for me."

Andromeda looked sad then. "She couldn't even let me help her."

"Andromeda," Narcissa bit her lip. "She doesn't mean it –"

"You see, she never has needed me. And it hurts Narcissa," Andromeda's eyes were shining with tears. "It hurts when I see how close you two are."

"I'm sorry," Narcissa whispered and Andromeda sniffed wiping her eyes.

"Don't be," she said hardening her voice. "I've accepted it now. To Bellatrix I will never be anything important. I guess I don't even love her that much either," she paused. "But I wish that you loved me more."

"I do love you."

"But nowhere near as much as you love her."

"It's…" Narcissa hesitated. "It's complicated Andy, it really is."

"It's wrong, really horrid and awful but sometimes… I think that this love you two share… it borders on obsessive. It's almost incestuous really."

Narcissa didn't realise she was holding her breath until she let it go. Her heart was pounding and her horror must have been plain on her face for Andromeda looked stricken and quickly apologised.

"I'm sorry! I know it's horrid and-"

"How could you?" Narcissa was still struggling to breathe. She found that acting horrified and disgusted was surprisingly easy. Hearing her sister say that to her reminded her of it and how it was seen as such a terrible thing. "How can you think such vile things?"

"I know!" Andromeda started to cry again and went to her sister trying to take her hand. "I am sorry! It's just sometimes it seems so intense-"

"Just stop!" Narcissa hissed and quickly looked at Bellatrix who lay oblivious to this. "I won't tell Bella you said this but I'm going to make this clear: I love Bellatrix like a sister and she loves me the same way. Nothing more at all."

Andromeda wiped her tears away and sank down onto the bed, looking incredibly distraught. Narcissa felt some twinges of guilt and shame but she wouldn't apologise, she had to stay angry in order to dispel any further thoughts Andromeda might have. No matter what no one should ever find out, especially her sister. A secret like that would destroy not only their lives but also everyone around them. Narcissa sighed and curled up around Bellatrix waiting for her to wake up and for Andromeda to leave. Realising that her sister was giving her the silent treatment, Andromeda got up and didn't look at them as she closed the door. When it clicked shut Bellatrix opened her eyes and turned, surprising Narcissa who moved back a little.

"I thought you were asleep," Narcissa murmured brushing back a lock of hair. Bellatrix gazed at her expressionless which made Narcissa uncomfortable. "You heard…?"

"Yes," her voice was hoarse and she swallowed. "I heard. She knows."

"No, she doesn't," Narcissa shook her head. "You should have seen her face, she looked so upset Bella. She believed me."

"This is so dangerous –"

"Ssh," Narcissa stroked her hair back and gave a faint smile. "You need some sleep."

"Have they returned?"

Narcissa didn't need her to explain who "they" were. "Yes. I said you were indisposed, though I'm sure mother will come up to check."

"No doubt," Bellatrix paused and then lowered her eyes. "I'm sorry for what happened… I shouldn't have lost control like that. I scared you."

"Yes, you did scare me," Narcissa agreed quietly. "Bella, you hurt yourself and didn't seem to care."

"I didn't care," she said her voice empty. "I liked it."

"Bella, don't," Narcissa pleaded. "You shouldn't."

"I know but I do. It's a nice pain Narcissa."

"No pain is nice," she whispered looking at her sister strangely but Bellatrix wasn't really paying much attention to her now. Her fingers were picking at the sheets and her voice was a soft sigh when she spoke.

"But you are my sweetest pain Narcissa."

Narcissa had no idea how to response. Bellatrix had a habit of leaving her lost for words and confused. She felt suddenly so drained after having all her emotions tossed about. She got up though it seemed as if Bellatrix didn't even notice her leave. Sometimes she became so vacant, withdrawing into herself that Narcissa worried that one day she would look at her and not see Bellatrix at all but a hollow girl resembling her.

Their mother did pay Bellatrix a visit, that was no surprise but didn't insist on having her come down for dinner that evening. Narcissa managed to sneak into the kitchen afterwards and ask a house-elf to take some food up to Bellatrix. The house-elf was dutiful and didn't ask questions about Narcissa's request, even though he knew that her mother hadn't said anything.

The girls spent the next couple days alone and away from each other since the incident with the mirror. She tried to pretend as if it never happened but it would play over in Narcissa's mind again and again. Bellatrix knew that but she didn't say anything and stayed relatively away from her. Narcissa saw that Bellatrix's mood changed again, her eyes alight once more but still Bellatrix didn't ask her to come shopping with her and Narcissa was glad for the moments she got for herself. Her head had been in absolute chaos since that day and she needed to regain some balance. She spent some time with Andromeda, having forgiven her and she felt better for it. The next time she spoke to her sister properly was on Christmas Eve.

Narcissa went down to put her gifts under the tree when everyone was either in bed or otherwise occupied. In the golden-orange light from the fire she hadn't expected to see Bellatrix lying on the sofa, reading a book and drinking something that looked awfully like their father's Fire Whiskey. Bellatrix heard her and looked up, Narcissa paused in the doorway holding the bag of presents tightly. Bellatrix's eyes drifted down and she smiled lightly, put her book and drink down and sat up.

"Presents?"

"Yes," Narcissa took a couple of steps forwards and looked at the tree seeing a pile of neatly wrapped gifts there. "I didn't think anyone would be down…"

"Neither did I," Bellatrix tilted her head. "Do I get a present?"

"Of course," Narcissa whispered and slowly went to the tree and bent down. Bellatrix watched her carefully place her gifts down and she came over and spied one with her name on it.

"Hey!" Narcissa complained as Bellatrix picked it up. "Tomorrow!"

"Can't I even open one? Please?" Bellatrix teased, gently pulling at the ribbon before Narcissa snatched it out of her hands.

"No, you can't," Narcissa stood up and hesitated for a moment. It seemed strange that they were able to almost slip back together as if nothing happened. Bellatrix seemed to want that and she had no stomach for a fight.

"Well, goodnight," she said after a moment.

"Wait," Bellatrix said quickly and Narcissa paused. "Are you angry with me?"

"No," Narcissa shifted on her feet. "Please Bella, let's just go to bed. I don't want to argue."

"Because I am sorry for what happened," Bellatrix insisted moving closer. "I really am."

"I know," Narcissa whispered and sighed. "I know you are."

"I have a gift for you," Bellatrix murmured and Narcissa raised her eyebrow at that.

"I thought it was pointless?" she said casually, echoing Bellatrix's words.

Bellatrix winced a little and scratched her neck awkwardly. "It is but you like presents and I like to give them to you."

"I can't open it now," Narcissa pointed out but Bellatrix smiled impishly.

"I doubt you'd want to open this in front of the family," she murmured playfully and Narcissa's eyes widened.

"Oh Merlin, what did you get me?"

"You have to open it and find out," Bellatrix prompted and bent down and found the present, giving it to her. "Go on then."

Narcissa bit her lip unsure and eyed the seemingly inoffensive package in her hands. Exhaling she went and sat on the sofa, Bellatrix closely sitting by her. It was quite a slim box and she tugged at the bow and pulled at the green and black wrapping. She gave a small gasp when she looked inside and pulled out a set of dark crimson silk underwear that were even more revealing and sensual than her others. She blushed with delight, smoothing her fingers over the soft fabric and then looked at Bellatrix from beneath her lashes.

"Thank you," she said with her heart fluttering.

"I thought you'd like them," Bellatrix leaned back and languidly reached out to trace the cup of the bra with her finger casually. "I did doubt the colour at first. Your complexion doesn't scream crimson but I could see you pulling it off."

"Yes?" Narcissa breathed, not unaware to the way Bellatrix was caressing the fabric as if she was caressing her.

"Mmhm," she leaned in and Narcissa turned to her out of habit. "So, you like it?"

"Yes, very much even though they are so revealing…"

"Half of the point sweetling," Bellatrix trailed her fingers across Narcissa's chin and down her neck. "I am sorry again."

"It doesn't matter," Narcissa swallowed at how close Bellatrix's mouth was. They hadn't been this close for some time, a fact that had irritated Narcissa at night as she lay alone in her bed.

"A kiss to make up?" Bellatrix asked huskily and Narcissa's heart was beating loudly in her chest.

"You have been in an awful mood with me."

"I know," Bellatrix murmured. "I know."

She slid her hand into her blonde hair and drew her head towards her, her mouth everything that Narcissa remembered. Narcissa kissed her back passionately, trying to quench all the longing she had and Bellatrix moaned. They didn't pause as the present slipped onto the floor from Narcissa's lap and they moved back, pressing themselves together, hating any space between them. Ignited by desire that had been denied to them for a while, their hands swept over each other and they kissed fiercely.

"We must stop," Bellatrix panted weakly, pressing her hand against Narcissa's chest to stop her. Her sister shook her head and continued to move so that Bellatrix's back was pressed down and Narcissa sat above her. "Narcissa…"

"Just a little bit more," she pleaded, bending down to press small, sweet kisses across Bellatrix's neck and pulled at the neckline of her nightdress to kiss the top of her chest. "Please Bella."

Bellatrix couldn't resist her even if she tried. Her hand went under Narcissa's gown and cupped her breast, rolling her nipple between her fingers, making her groan and copy the action on her. But they went no further than kissing and touching, keeping their clothes on, even if slightly askew and exposing. The risk of someone coming in, family or a house-elf made them disentangle and try to compose themselves as much as possible.

"How many girls have you been with?" Narcissa suddenly asked as Bellatrix traced patterns across her shoulder.

"Does it matter?"

"Yes."

"Fine," Bellatrix glanced at her lap. "Two – not including you. Well, one really."

"Oh," Narcissa was both relieved and surprised. "I thought…"

"I know," Bellatrix scratched her neck awkwardly again.

"Do you prefer it?" she asked curiously but Bellatrix shrugged her shoulders.

"Not particularly, I don't have a preference. Except for you," she added with a smile.

"And boys?"

"A fair few," Bellatrix leaned back. "Why are you asking me this?"

"Because I want to know. I don't like other girls," Narcissa stated and Bellatrix laughed a little.

"It's just sex Narcissa. Boy or girl. Though boys are easier for just a onetime thing," Bellatrix added. Silence descended and then Narcissa stood shakily gathering her present into her arms. They both jumped as they heard the chiming of the clock and Narcissa gave her a small smile.

"Merry Christmas, Bella."

"Merry Christmas, Narcissa," Bellatrix said quietly as she watched her sister leave.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** So, thoughts?


	8. Chapter 8

**Title:** The Sweetest Poison in the Blood - Part VII

**Author:** themirrorofsin

**Ship:** Bellatrix/Narcissa, with background Lucius/Narcissa, Bellatrix/Rodolphus

**Genre(s):** Romance/Hurt/Comfort

**Rating**: M/ NC 17

**Summary**: "_Shaking with aguish fear, and pain, she kissed and kissed her with a hungry mouth_."

**Warning:** Incest, sex, mentions of sex between minors, mentions of abuse, language, self-harm.

Part VIII

For Fate with jealous eye does see

Two perfect loves, nor lets them close:

Their union would her ruin be,

And her tyrranic power depose.

-_The Definition of Love_, Andrew Marvell

Christmas passed and was better than any of them expected. Their cousins came around for Boxing Day which didn't please Bellatrix or Narcissa in fact. Sirius annoyed her sister constantly and Narcissa found his attitude grating upon her own nerves. Other than that everyone's mood was much improved and Bellatrix and Narcissa had even found time for Narcissa to show her sister how her secret gift looked. They both discovered delight in it, Narcissa found herself stirred by having Bellatrix gaze at her with such burning lust. Sometimes Narcissa 'accidently' touched her sister between her legs as she stroked her thighs or hips and felt how damp Bellatrix got during their time together.

She knew enough now from the rather useless information her mother had told her when she first got her period and from what the girls at school had discussed during the night. Bellatrix had told her things which made her blush but also incredibly curious. She also found one or two books that had been rather enlightening and spurned on her sexual awakening.

But however much she tried push for more, Bellatrix always slowed them down. There were certain things that Bellatrix couldn't do, even though Narcissa knew she wanted to. Once more she found herself frustrated in bed alone because Bellatrix had put a stop to what they were doing, saying the repetitive lines of her being too young.

Another reason that Narcissa wanted more from Bellatrix was that, by New Year, it wasn't a secret that their parents were looking for a suitable match for Bellatrix. It was something that her sister had known about for a while but didn't want to tell her. Family names kept cropping up in conversation and worse still, Narcissa knew that one of these families would eventually take Bellatrix away from her.

So far Bellatrix kept their parents at bay yet their mother was beginning to press upon her the need to make a good family connection. Most of them were not faceless strangers, either still at Hogwarts or having left the year before. The only one Bellatrix forcefully closed herself off from was Lucius Malfoy. Her obvious detest for him and the family ruled him out. She wouldn't marry for love but neither would she marry someone who she considered beneath her.

Though they never really spoke about it, Narcissa had once or twice tried to coax her into telling her her true feelings. Bellatrix was somewhat amused by Narcissa's romanticism and talk of love. Her own view was that marriage was more of a way of ensuring pure bloodlines and succession. She didn't have a care for romantic attachment knowing full well that her future marriage would be anything but.

That made Narcissa contemplate her own future, one where she was married and had her own family. It was hard to imagine not having Bellatrix at the centre of all that even though she knew in her heart that no one could ever replace the love she held for her. She would, she hoped, marry for love or at least affection. She wanted it to mean more than some cold arrangement between two families. It also made her think sadly of what possible future did she and Bellatrix face together? Theirs was a doomed romance, tragic from its very origin of being between two sisters and she deemed it worthy of any other famous tragedy of two lovers. Yet for Bellatrix, marriage would not end it. She didn't have any objections to carrying on together since she would be married in name only.

"I wish I could marry you," Narcissa said once bitterly and Bellatrix kissed her with a laugh, pulling her into her arms.

"I'd make an awful spouse," Bellatrix ran her fingers through her blonde hair. "Never helping around the house or cooking."

"That wouldn't matter," Narcissa defended her point twisting onto her back and they both gazed at the ceiling. "I would do all of that."

"The perfect housewife," Bellatrix said with some sarcasm but they both thought about it with small smiles. There was no point in trying to fight the inevitable but since Bellatrix had no intention of letting her go, for that Narcissa was grateful.

/x/

It was the day before they were due to go back to Hogwarts and yet another argument sprang between the sisters as they wandered around Diagon and Knockturn Alley. Narcissa didn't even know how it started but there they were arguing and at home they didn't speak to each other. Thankfully their parents were too wrapped up in their own lives to notice and Narcissa heard Bellatrix slam her bedroom door shut and let out a frustrated sigh. Trust her sister to spoil things just as they were going to leave, Narcissa thought and carefully began to pack her trunk. That evening Bellatrix didn't come down to eat and Narcissa was half in mind to send something up to her but didn't. She was still annoyed with her and wasn't going to give in first. But as she walked past the bathroom she heard her sister crying and stopped. Pushing the door open a little she saw Bellatrix sitting on the floor, hands covering her face and her whole body shaking.

"Bella?"

"Go away!" she shouted through her tears and Narcissa hesitated but closed the door behind her and crouched by her sister.

"Bella," she whispered. "I'm sorry."

"Fuck off," she snarled and wiped her face. "I'm fine."

"No you're not," Narcissa tried to touch her but she pulled away. "I know I annoyed you and -"

"It's got nothing to do with that! Not everything I feel is because of you!"

"Then what is it?"

Bellatrix sniffed and reached out for some tissue to blow her nose. "Alright, it is because of you but more because I'm just so annoyed with myself."

"Why?"

"Because I'm so angry at everything to do with us. We have to go back to that school and pretend that nothing is going on between us," she spat and Narcissa kept silent. "I have to pretend not to want you and I just can't. I hate waiting for you."

"I know," Narcissa whispered. "But next year-"

"Next year what? Nothing is going to change. You'll be there and I'll be whoever the fuck knows where. I'll only see you on your holidays and-"

Narcissa leaned in a kissed her to stop her from talking. She couldn't bear to hear their future laid out with so little to look forward to. She knew all of this, knew that her time now with Bellatrix was precious and so hated it when they spent their time arguing.

She pulled away gently and opened her eyes to see her sister staring at her. "Not tonight, please don't talk about this tonight."

Their hands reached out and held on tightly and after a moment Narcissa smiled light. "Bella, I want you."

"No, Narcissa-"

"Please," she begged. "Just tonight."

"No and shut up before someone hears you!" Bellatrix stood up and went back to her room with Narcissa following close behind. She watched her sister make sure that her door was locked before stalked around her room.

"Bella, please."

"Fuck off Narcissa," she spat. "Stop asking me to do this."

"I want you to though."

Bellatrix eyed her with a hard face that betrayed none of her thoughts. She sank down on her bet and Narcissa went to her and sat down next to her with a small sigh.

"Bella I want you more than anything and I just want to feel something again."

Bellatrix kept silent as Narcissa shifted towards her and leaned in kissing her shoulder through her clothes and then proceeded to kiss her neck. Bellatrix remained still but her hands clenched the sheets below and Narcissa noticed her chest rising and falling rapidly. She gently pushed her back and was slightly surprised that Bellatrix didn't resist her. She hadn't anticipated doing this but swung her leg over Bellatrix's hips and leaned above her lightly. She hadn't lied to her when she said she wanted her, her hands swiftly undoing the buttons to Bellatrix's dress, kissing at her exposed collarbone and shifting down she pressed her mouth over her stomach. Bellatrix watched her through heavy-lidded eyes trying to control her reactions but Narcissa felt her heart racing beneath her lips.

"Stop," Bellatrix said but her voice had lost much of its earlier venom.

Narcissa paused and looked up, "I don't want to."

"Narcissa, _please_," Bellatrix squeezed her eyes shut. "Why do you have to make things so difficult?"

"I'm not," Narcissa said quietly. "Why are you denying this?"

"Because I need some control!" she struggled to sit up. "Do you want me to lose any of the sense I have left?"

"No," she whispered, running a finger down Bellatrix's arm. "But I love you."

"Stop saying that."

"But I do," Narcissa insisted. "Please don't turn me away. You're the only person I will ever love like this. I need you."

Bellatrix slowly looked at her and Narcissa felt her heart clench. "You talk like such an adult… but you're not. I _can't_."

"Then let me do this for you," Narcissa whispered and gently held her sister's face in her hands. "_Let me_."

Bellatrix's shiver that worked its way through her body was one of surrender and she swallowed, her body finally relaxing after its stiff composure. Narcissa's smile was ghostly as she resumed kissing her lovingly, the worst of it over tonight. She was glad that it didn't escalate further than it sometimes did with such violent rages that Narcissa couldn't be anywhere near her in fear. She had won this time and felt relief course through her. She smiled as she touched the necklace that Bellatrix still wore and then trailed her hands down her arm as Bellatrix lay back down.

"You don't have to…" Bellatrix murmured reaching out to stroke Narcissa's hair. "For all my talk of impatience I can wait. You're the only person in this world I would ever wait for."

"I know," Narcissa whispered against her stomach and tugged the dress off her hips and down her legs. "I hate making you wait."

Bellatrix didn't reply, just lay quiet and still as Narcissa pulled off Bellatrix's stockings and then crawled back up and reached under her unhooking her bra and pulled it off.

"I've thought about this for a while now," Narcissa breathed wetting her lips as her heart sped at the thoughts she was entertaining. Bellatrix's eyes narrowed curiously but Narcissa smiled and kissed her mouth for the first time that night. She knew she would never become bored with kissing Bellatrix, her body heating up from it. Simultaneously they moaned tongues lapping and exploring, eager to drown in each other. Narcissa boldly touched her breasts, pressing her own body against her sister's and soon her tongue swirled around one pert nipple causing Bellatrix's back to arch.

She pulled back to quickly pull of her clothes, feeling constricted in them and tossing them carelessly aside, she lay back over Bellatrix in just her underwear. She tangled her hands in her sister's dark curls, drawing her neck back and sucking at the spot that joined her neck and shoulder. Then her hands swept over Bellatrix's body, a body she had come to learn so well.

"Narcissa!"

Bellatrix grabbed hold of her sister's hand that touched her through her black lace knickers. But as Narcissa pressed her fingers against her Bellatrix sucked in a sharp breath. Already the fabric was damp and she traced the outline of her sex through it lightly. Then she carefully rubbed over where her clit was until Bellatrix's hips bucked and she pressed down harder.

Bellatrix swore, gasping as her hands clenched the sheets and Narcissa confidently moved the fabric aside, her fingers slipping over her flesh. Her sister was so hot and wet that she couldn't help but smile at how aroused Bellatrix was. Bellatrix shut her eyes, rocking her hips with panting breaths and Narcissa dared to rolled down her knickers and explore her sex a little longer before slipping a finger inside. Her sister let out a low liquid moan and then pulled Narcissa down to kiss her fiercely.

"We have to be quiet," Bellatrix breathed and Narcissa felt her heart swell and slowly moved her finger in and out before adding a second. This was the most erotic thing she had ever done, not even daring to do this much on her own body.

Bellatrix then took her hand and, whispering to her, she told and showed her exactly what to do. Narcissa thrust her fingers in finding a rhythm that Bellatrix enjoyed and rubbed her clit with her thumb. Bellatrix rocked her hips in time and Narcissa could barely breathe herself, delighted in watching her sister stifle her moan with her hand over her mouth and arch. Unconsciously her own body swayed against Bellatrix's and between breaths they kissed with open gasping mouths. Her cheeks were flushed, just like Bellatrix's and their bodies were damp from perspiration, Bellatrix clenched around her fingers making Narcissa groan that the sensation.

"Make me come," Bellatrix whispered, her eyes dazed as she looked up. Narcissa complied moving her fingers faster and trailed her lips over her neck. Bellatrix's mouth opened in a silent cry as she came, Narcissa gazed at her as she writhed beneath her, her heart thundering in her chest. Her sister literally took her breath away with her pale skin glowing, eyes bright and unfocused and wet lips parted as she sucked air into her lungs. Narcissa slid her hand out and discreetly wiped her fingers before lying down next to Bellatrix. She smiled shyly as Bellatrix looked at her with a sensual smile of her own and stroked back her blonde hair.

"That was unexpected," she murmured, her voice as sexy as hell. Narcissa sighed contentedly wrapping her arm around Bellatrix's waist.

"Was it… was it good…?" she dared to ask biting her lip slightly.

"Yes," Bellatrix assured her, running her fingers down her spine. Narcissa looked at her and she stared at the ceiling, her cheeks still flushed and Narcissa wondered what she was thinking. She tugged the covers over them which jolted Bellatrix out of her daze and she looked like she wanted to say something, opening her mouth but then shut it again. Narcissa didn't mind the silence as it was better than hearing useless words.

"You do understand that there's no going back," Bellatrix whispered suddenly and Narcissa swallowed lightly. "Narcissa, look at me."

She did and Bellatrix's eyes bore into her, staring straight inside her. "I know."

"I wonder," she murmured touching her cheek with a finger, drawing it to her chin then down her neck. "I wonder if you really do."

She lay beside Bellatrix until her sister fell asleep and then got out and got into her own bed. She shivered under the covers and her heart jolted when she thought of how her sister had arched and moaned _all because of her_. She wanted to feel shame, a sense of disgust but she couldn't. She had wanted this, to change their relationship and to take it forward. She wanted it and she knew it was her want that damned her.

/x/

Bellatrix barely spoke to her as they arrived at King's Cross and went through the barrier to platform nine and three quarters. Her mood was pensive and she was too distracted by her thoughts to bother with greeting anyone. Narcissa smiled lightly as Lucius passed by but that smile faded when she saw two boys and a girl give her sister a look and then whisper. Actually, she noticed quite a few people whispered as they boarded and when she looked over at Andromeda, her sister avoided her eyes. For one horrific moment Narcissa thought that somehow someone had found out about them, that everyone knew what was going on between them and she felt faint.

"Bella," she whispered to her sister as they moved down the train. "Bella, people are whispering."

Bellatrix looked down at her and then glanced around, only then noticing the slight looks some people gave her. "So they are."

"Do you think…?" she began but the look that Bellatrix gave her made her feel stupid. They found an empty compartment and settled down, Narcissa pulled out a magazine whilst Bellatrix looked out of the window waiting for the train to depart. Narcissa was going to ask her sister another question when there was a thud against their compartment door and Narcissa looked up to see Rita Skeeter, a girl in Bellatrix's year, peer in and then open the door.

"Bella," she said as a greeting and sat down next to her with a bright smile. Narcissa took in her appearance from the tight Slytherin robes to the perfectly curled blonde hair and sharp emerald green nails. Bellatrix raised her eyebrow as Rita grinned at her and shifted to face her.

"What do you want Skeeter?"

"Oh come now Bella," Rita smirked. "What makes you think I want something?"

Bellatrix snorted. "Why else would you come and find me?"

Narcissa watched the two of them curiously. Rita sat quite close to her sister, flashing her a bright smile and trying to charm her. Narcissa wondered why Bellatrix didn't just tell her where to go instead of playing coy.

"Fine," Rita leaned in. "Well, I've just come to ask what I think everyone is wondering, are you seeing that boy from before Christmas?"

Narcissa gaped at her but Bellatrix looked slightly amused by it, tilting her head to the side. "Rita Skeeter, gossip extraordinaire."

"There's much to be made out of gossip," Rita kept her smile steady. "So?"

"There's nothing to say," Bellatrix replied giving Rita a hard look. "There is no story."

"A pity," Rita murmured moving back and pushed a curl out of her face. "Good Christmas?"

"Sort of."

They heard the blow of the final whistle and then the train started to pull off. Narcissa shifted in her seat and continued to listen to the exchange before her.

"My, my you are chatty aren't you?" Rita smirked and Bellatrix rolled her eyes. "Well, my Christmas was fine, thank you for asking," she added sarcastically. "I think I have secured a position at the _Prophet_ for next year."

"And how many people did you have to screw to get that?" Bellatrix asked dryly and Rita laughed loudly.

"Two," she admitted with a sly look. "Though only one was a proper fuck."

Narcissa cringed at the words and the girl herself. Bellatrix noticed her disgust and gave a tight smile, inclining her head in a way that Rita knew as a dismissal. Rita stood and brushed down her robes and readjusted her glasses.

"Well, I'll see you later," she said. "And I will tell everyone that _nothing_ happened?"

"Yes," Bellatrix said and Rita smiled her easy smile and left them with a sharp click of the compartment door closing.

"Thank goodness," Narcissa breathed and Bellatrix looked out at the changing scenery.

"Hurts your sensibilities?" Bellatrix asked with a slight hint of mockery in her voice.

"She's crude and just so…" Narcissa searched for a word. "Common."

Bellatrix raised her eyebrow slowly, "How snobbish of you."

"But she is! I didn't know you were friends," Narcissa added peevishly.

"We're not – not since your fourth year anyway," Bellatrix said offhandedly looking out of the window again.

"What happened?"

"We just drifted apart. Besides, you're right she is too common for us."

Narcissa observed at her sister for a moment and the conversation died then, both of them turning in on themselves. She flicked the pages of her magazine again and Bellatrix closed her eyes, her body rocked lightly with the movement of the train. She guessed that now was not the time to talk about what had happened last night, the new shift in their relationship. She had no idea what Bellatrix was thinking and she knew she would just have to be patient as they'd have to talk about it sooner or later.

/x/

"And so you're asking, what, permission?"

Bellatrix raised her eyebrow. "No, I'm _telling _you."

"And I'm supposed to just accept this?" Narcissa asked astounded and was annoyed by how calm Bellatrix looked. They were the only ones in the common room still, standing in a dark corner and talking lowly. After the welcoming feast and the eager get-togethers, they both lingered behind whilst everyone made their way slowly to bed. Bellatrix had grabbed her hand and pulled her over and Narcissa had been foolish to think that Bellatrix had wanted to kiss her. Instead she found herself listening to her sister talk about something that left her feeling winded and angry.

"Yes," Bellatrix paused for a second. "You have to understand, I'm doing this to stop these stupid rumours."

"But it's true," Narcissa hissed. "You did sleep with her! And I thought that Skeeter girl was going to tell everyone nothing happened?"

"But people will still talk until they have something new to talk about," Bellatrix countered. "_Try _to understand."

"How can I possibly understand this?" Narcissa cried. "I'm supposed to stand by and watch you go and sleep with other boys?"

"I don't want to but I can't see any other way," she looked away. "I thought it would have gone away by now…"

"And what about me?" Narcissa whispered pained and Bellatrix cast her a sad glance.

"I don't know," she said softly. "It will only be for a week or so. Then we can be together again."

"After you have fucked around," Narcissa snapped and she saw her sister's eyes widen and then an angry look settled on her face.

"Yes, after that," she snarled. "Goodnight Narcissa."

"Bellatrix!" she shouted, not caring if someone heard and caught hold of her sister who stepped away from her. "No, you can't just do this!"

"If people keep talking it might ruin everything!" Bellatrix tried to get out of her grip. "Let me go!"

"Ruin what?"

"Something…" Bellatrix hesitated. "Something that I'm not even sure about right now."

"You have all these secrets," Narcissa whispered, moving closer. "All these secrets that you don't share."

Bellatrix turned her head away and let out a breath and Narcissa knew what she was doing. She was trying to control her emotions. Then she slowly touched Narcissa's face and leaned in to press a kiss against her mouth. Narcissa's lips trembled and opened but Bellatrix pulled back from the kiss.

"I will share, one day," Bellatrix murmured. "I promise that one day you will understand."

"Please Bella," Narcissa held her hand tightly. "Please don't do this."

"I have no choice," Bellatrix said her torment plain on her face and they both looked away, hearts aching.


	9. Chapter 9

**Title:** The Sweetest Poison in the Blood - Part IX

**Author:** themirrorofsin

**Ship:** Bellatrix/Narcissa, with background Lucius/Narcissa, Bellatrix/Rodolphus

**Genre(s):** Romance/Hurt/Comfort

**Rating**: M/ NC 17

**Summary**: "_Shaking with aguish fear, and pain, she kissed and kissed her with a hungry mouth_."

**Warning:** Incest, sex, mentions of sex between minors, mentions of abuse, language, self-harm.

**A/N:** sorry for the wait! But thank you for all the reviews x

Part IX

Say over again, and yet once over again,

That thou dost love me.

- _Sonnet 21_, Elizabeth Barrett Browning

She did her best to avoid her sister from then on, not wanting to see her with the boy she picked for dismissing the rumours with. From her distance Narcissa saw really what her sister was like and it was rather discouraging to see her behave the way she did. She was sure a lot of the professors had given up on trying to curb her wildness and as she watched Bellatrix and her friends sneer at a group of girls down the corridor, her heart sank. She wasn't oblivious to the amount of people that despised her sister and that transferred that onto her and sometimes Andromeda as well.

Narcissa wandered into the girl's bathroom after her last lesson and as she opened the door she heard a girl crying and the murmur of voices. She glanced up and saw five girls, two Ravenclaw and three Gryffindor huddling by the sinks. One girl, a short blonde Ravenclaw was wiping her eyes and looked startled as Narcissa walked in. They fell silent and Narcissa lowered her eyes, moving to find an empty cubical.

"Black," the crying girl's sister stalked up to Narcissa, her anger blazing and Narcissa shrank back. "You tell your bitch of a sister, if she ever touches my sister again then she'll know about it."

Narcissa's eyes widened as the girl had drawn up her wand and pointed at her chest. She looked over at the other girls and the similar glare and resentment was in their expressions. Narcissa opened her mouth to say something but at that moment Andromeda walked in. The girl towering over Narcissa glanced over then grimaced and backed off and then they left quickly with a few mutters and sharp glances. Andromeda watched them with a curious frown before she came up to Narcissa and saw how shaken she was.

"Are you alright?" she murmured and Narcissa shook her head. She felt Andromeda slide her arms around her and draw her into a hug. It had a while since Narcissa had felt something that was just to comfort her with no strings or complications. She started to cry and Andromeda stroked her hair, saying nothing but waiting for her to calm down. Narcissa didn't even know why she was really crying, all her emotions had been kept inside for the past two weeks and finally she just let go.

When she drew in a shaky breath Andromeda loosened her arms and then found a tissue to wipe her tears.

"Sorry," Narcissa mumbled blowing her nose but Andromeda gave a small smile.

"It's fine," she said then sighed. "What's wrong?"

"I… Those girls were upset with something Bella had done and…" Narcissa broke off looking at the floor. "Why does she do these things?"

"I don't know," Andromeda whispered pushing some of her hair back. "She's always been like this. When I arrived everyone thought I was going to be the same but I'm not," Narcissa glanced at her, there was a hard note in Andromeda's voice. "I'm _nothing_ like Bellatrix and neither are you."

"We are similar-"

"No," Andromeda shook her head. "You think you are but you're different. You're _good_ and _sane_."

Guilt rose quickly and Narcissa swallowed hard. She wasn't good, she thought and she had more than once questioned her own sanity. Was it sane to desire your own kin? She didn't think so but she kept quiet.

"Want to go back?" Andromeda asked in the silence and Narcissa nodded, quickly popping into the toilet and then walked back with her sister. The common room was rather busy but it took only seconds for Narcissa to find her sister. Bellatrix was staring right at them as they walked in, her expression unreadable and Narcissa felt her chest constrict. She wanted to go over there, sit with her and have her speak to her but she didn't move. Andromeda noticed the look between her sisters and gently touched Narcissa's arm, making her look away.

"Is everything alright between you? You haven't spoken much."

"She's been busy," Narcissa murmured. "Let's just go over there," she pointed out to the empty corner away from their sister and Andromeda let it go. Though she did cast a look back and saw Bellatrix's eyes watch them darkly. Bellatrix caught her eye and then stiffly turned away and Andromeda sighed, too tired to be bothered with Bellatrix's mood.

Narcissa never told Bellatrix about the bathroom scene. It was another complication that she wanted to avoid though she thought about and wondered about her sister. She wished that sometimes others – Andromeda included – could see the Bellatrix that she often did. She curled up on the chair wishing that her other sister was with her.

**/x/**

The weather was quite pleasant the next day as Narcissa took some time to herself and wandered down to the lake. She liked it there, just watching the way the water gently rippled in the breeze and it calmed her. Her sister, she knew, was captivated by fire. She had seen Bellatrix just staring in wonder as the flames danced and consumed the scraps of parchment that she held to them. She preferred water with its surface that never-betrayed what lay beneath. People would misjudged depths and sometimes, she knew, that could be fatal.

She descended down the bank and walked around the bushes, abruptly stopping when she saw who was already there just a few feet away. Bellatrix lifted her head and looked mildly surprised to see her sister standing there. She tossed the stone she held into the water and Narcissa watched the ripples expand and crash into each other.

"I didn't realised you'd be here," she said as a way of beginning a conversation and Bellatrix shrugged sitting down on the ground. Narcissa edged closer dropping her bag but didn't sit too close, drawing up her knees to her chest tightly.

"I like this spot," Bellatrix murmured and Narcissa nodded. It was a place they would often come down to spend time together. Came, Narcissa quietly reminded herself. They hadn't been here together for a while.

"Same," Narcissa whispered tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. "What are you doing?"

"Thinking," Bellatrix replied picking up some small pebbles. "And throwing rocks."

"So I see," Narcissa watched her toss stone after stone into the water and sighed. She picked up a handful herself and found the flattest ones, discarding the rest.

"What are you doing here?" Bellatrix asked after a while and Narcissa stood up, moving closer to the water's edge.

"Thinking," she said calmly and then skimmed a pebble across the water. She counted the jumps and smiled. "And throwing rocks."

Bellatrix couldn't help but smile in return and came to stand next to her. "You're good at that."

Narcissa shrugged and skimmed another going further. "Not much of a talent."

"I guess," Bellatrix tossed one and it sunk after the third jump. "I'm shit."

"You need to flick your wrist like this," Narcissa showed her and Bellatrix watched then did the same. It went up to five paces and she grinned trying again. For a while they just skimmed pebbled, Bellatrix unable to beat Narcissa but they both laughed a little as the harder Bellatrix tried the more she failed at it.

"I'm not fucking around anymore," Bellatrix told her suddenly and Narcissa's, distracted by her words, just dropped the rock into the water.

"Oh," she replied lightly even though her heart thundered and she swallowed. Those were the words she had wanted to hear for over three weeks and the relief was a little overwhelming. "I see."

There was a slight pause and Bellatrix waited for her to say or do something but she never did.

"Is that it? Is that all you're going to say?" Bellatrix turned to her and Narcissa looked at her sadly.

"What do you want me to do? Start crying and jumping around?"

"You don't seem happy."

"I am but…" Narcissa sighed spreading her hands out. "I'm still hurt."

Bellatrix shook her head slowly, "Hurt? Narcissa, you _know _it meant nothing. People are no longer talking about, you know, and everything is as it was."

"It isn't though," Narcissa replied pained. "To you it means nothing but to me… You didn't even talk to me."

"I hardly saw you running to chat with me either," Bellatrix muttered.

"You were hardly around!"

"You could have found me!"

They stared at each other, tempers raised suddenly and then Narcissa turned away, walking back up the bank.

"Where are you going?" Bellatrix shouted after her.

"That doesn't concern you," Narcissa snapped, picking up her bag and slinging it over her shoulder. Bellatrix stalked up to her and grabbed hold of her arm, spinning her around. "You're just going to walk away? You never fight do you? Maybe that's why it's so easy to walk over you."

"Shut up," Narcissa hissed and Bellatrix laughed at her.

"Is that is?" she mocked and Narcissa knew this is what Bellatrix wanted. She wanted an argument and suddenly she did too.

"You are such a bitch," she hissed and tried to pull away. "Let me go!"

"_Never_," Bellatrix said firmly and Narcissa struggled. "I'll never let go."

The words were whispered and the meaning far deeper making Narcissa shiver and look at her sister's face. She didn't think, her free hand came up and it was as if she was watching herself from far away. Her hand connected with Bellatrix's cheek and she felt the sting of the slap and the sound echoing in her ears.

Bellatrix's eyes widened in disbelief, her mouth parted and head jerked. Narcissa stared in horror as she saw her sister's cheek flush red, her palm hurting and her heart plummeted.

"Oh, Bella, I'm –"

She never finished her apology, she was suddenly being dragged by the arm into the outskirts of Forbidden Forest and although she tried to stop her, her sister just pulled her along. She had no idea what Bellatrix was going to do to her now. She wasn't expecting to be pushed up hard against a tree trunk, Bellatrix still gripping her arm tightly and looked around once before kissing her viciously.

Narcissa gasped into her mouth as Bellatrix kept up her onslaught of ravaging kisses on her mouth and neck. She could barely breathe and tangled her fingers into her sister's hair, holding her close and felt tears burn in the corners of her eyes.

Bellatrix gazed at her, eyes scorching and her breath came out in short, hot pants against her lips. "Forgive me." Narcissa's heart stopped at the words. "_Please_."

"Bella," Narcissa breathed, her chest painfully contracting with the rush of emotions.

"Please," Bellatrix whispered, her lips following a ghostly path down her neck. "I need you to forgive me. I need you."

"But you'll do this again," Narcissa whispered and Bellatrix looked at her. There was so much in her eyes that Narcissa didn't understand but she saw sadness and a small tear escape the corner of her eye. She wasn't denying it and they stayed in that tense silence for a while before Bellatrix eased back slightly, letting her arm go.

It suddenly occurred to Narcissa that Bellatrix had decided, after all, to let her go and in blind panic reached out to pull her back against her. She kissed her hard, telling her over and over that she was forgiven and Bellatrix clung to her and Narcissa could taste her tears on her lips.

"I forgive you, if you promise that, no matter what, you will _never _leave me," Narcissa whispered ardently by her ear and Bellatrix caught her face with her hands. Her grip was tight and forced her to look her sister in the eye.

"I will never leave you. You are _all_ I have and want," Bellatrix with such vehement that Narcissa knew it was the truth. Narcissa nodded, unable to speak and tilted her head, grazing her lips against Bellatrix's. Bellatrix's hold softened and so did her kisses. No longer seeking forgiveness, knowing that it would be given every time, she cradled her face and gently deepened the kiss. Narcissa sank against her, hands sliding up to stroke and tangle in her hair and she sighed softly, her mouth opening under Bellatrix's. Bellatrix's tongue slowly lapped at hers, her hands swept down her figure and her fingers curled on her hips.

Narcissa lay her head against her shoulder, closing her eyes slightly and Bellatrix held her, rubbing her cheek against her hair. For that single moment Narcissa forgot that she was at Hogwarts, forgot everything that had happened and only focused on the warm body pressed against her own. That was all that mattered in the end.

"Tell me that you love me," she murmured and Bellatrix's arms tightened a fraction.

"I love you," Bellatrix spoke softly, so softly that Narcissa barely heard her.

"Again."

"I love you," she repeated louder this time, squeezing her eyes shut at the confession. Narcissa buried her face against her neck, her smile faint but triumphant all the same.

**/x/**

Summer was fast approaching as so were the exams which were making a lot of the students stressed from the desperation to pass. It was mid-morning and Narcissa nibbled her lip as she turned the pages of her potions book, trying to write notes and remember everything but she couldn't focus. The main reason was because Bellatrix's hand was stroking her leg, hidden from sight from others, under the table. Bellatrix was bored, she was more of a last minute glance over a textbook kind (which, to Narcissa's annoyance, worked well for her since she always got good or acceptable grades). To her, N.E.W.T.s were nothing to worry about which was a perception so different from the others in her year who were desperately trying to revise their subjects. Narcissa too found that she had to really sit down and revise in order to do well, considering that half of mind was nearly always thinking or concerned about her sister.

"Come on Narcissa, you know this!" Bellatrix protested as her sister swatted her hand away.

"I don't! I need to revise Bella," Narcissa looked at her pleadingly. "Please, just let me do this and then I'm all yours later."

"Later?"

"Yes," she turned the page again. "Shouldn't you revise as well?" she added with a little bit of worry and Bellatrix looked angry at the tone.

"No, I don't," she snapped.

"Well, I _do_," Narcissa sighed turning away from her and picked up her quill to start writing some notes.

"Fine," Bellatrix stood up angrily, jolting the table and spilling Narcissa's ink over the table.

"Bella!" she cried picking up the pot and hastily saving her work. "Look at what you've done!"

Bellatrix scoffed, "Come off it, it didn't even touch your precious revision notes!"

"I need to revise! I'll come to you later just leave me alone to finish!" she said as she dabbed quickly at the ink to minimize the damage but turning back to her sister she could see that Bellatrix was in no mood. Being bored it was very easy for her mood to switch to aggression or complete despondency. It seemed that it was aggression won tonight.

"What makes you think I'd want you later anyway?" she asked spitefully.

"Bella!" Narcissa gaped at her and felt like she had been slapped. "Bella, please don't –" she tried to argue but she watched in despair as her sister stormed off, pushing a younger year out of the way. She felt burning tears in her eyes as she stared down at her lap, praying that she didn't cry and she minutes later she felt someone hover near her. She glanced up, in a wild hope that it was Bellatrix but instead it was Lucius Malfoy

"Oh, hello," she sniffed and wiped her eyes and Lucius sat near her and then pulled out his wand and wiped away some of the remaining ink. "Sorry."

He shrugged, "It's fine. Fight with Bellatrix?"

"How do you know?" she asked frowning.

"Saw her storm away, maybe hexing someone as she went."

"Oh no!" she gasped but then caught he gave a small smile. "Oh, you're joking."

"Yes, but she nearly did."

"I upset her but I don't want to talk about," Narcissa admitted miserably and Lucius glanced at her notes.

"You're revising potions now?" he asked, changing the conversation and she was glad he did.

"Yes, I really need to revise it as it's the only one I think I might fail."

The boy looked at her thoughtfully then offered his help.

"Oh, thank you…" she said hesitantly. "Why…?"

"Looking at these notes you've made you're never going to remember them and I know these potions well."

"I see," she looked down and saw that he was right. "Thank you."

He smiled a little at her thanks and in the end sat there with her, helping her go through potions which only emphasised how much she didn't understand. Lucius was nice if not a little condescending at times as she made her way through the list of the potions she had to remember. Two hours later she finished and sighed with relief as Lucius smiled and stretched.

"I should go and find Bella," Narcissa murmured more to herself.

"Before she runs rampant with rage," he teased but she frowned a little.

"Don't," she stood and gathered her things. "Thank you again for helping me."

"Anytime," he smiled and with a small nod she left him to find her sister.

The rest of the day passed but she hadn't been able to get close to her. Bellatrix surrounded herself with her little group and made it quite clear that she wasn't talking to her. It caused a small stir as the two Black sisters were usually so inseparable and hardly fought at all – at least in public. Narcissa noticed grimly that her sister's mood wasn't any better and as the group practiced some spells, her sister duelled rather viciously. Even the spells that normally wouldn't harm, Bellatrix managed to make forceful enough to hurt her opponent. They stopped only when someone had to go to the Hospital Wing and Bellatrix laughed before sloping off to find something else to amuse herself with.

Narcissa disappeared off to the Library for the remainder of the day until she decided to try and find Bellatrix again. She found her in the Slytherin common room, lying across a boy from the same year. Narcissa's heart plummeted as she watched him laugh at something Bellatrix said. When Bellatrix saw Narcissa come in she smirked and leaned up to whisper something to the boy before she got up and sauntered over to Narcissa.

"What?" she mocked, crossing her arms over her chest and raising her eyebrow. "Aren't I allowed to _talk_ to boys now?"

"Is that what you call it?" she replied coolly and was irritated to see Bellatrix's sly smile.

"Don't trust me? Your own sister?" she mockingly pulled a sad face and clutched her heart. "Oh how you wound me!"

Narcissa rolled her eyes and made to move past her when Bellatrix lay a hand against her shoulder. She glanced up and Bellatrix's eyes darted to the door and with a sigh she followed her sister outside. A good thing about the dungeons was that, apart from Slytherins, no one else came down there and once making sure they were alone Bellatrix spoke.

"So, enjoyed yourself with Malfoy?"

"He was just helping me with potions – unlike you. And how do you know about that?"

Bellatrix snorted. "Rita dropped by but yes, I'm sure that was all."

"It was," Narcissa said hotly. "Anyway, I'm supposed to be angry with _you_!"

"What did I do?" Bellatrix feigned innocence. Ever since the incident at the lake they had been sniping at each other. Narcissa knew that it was because they both wanted to be together but it seemed impossible to be so alone. Today had just proved to be one of those days when they tested each other's patience.

"Don't Bella," she rubbed her temple. "Just don't."

Bellatrix noticed her sister wince a little, her face frowning in pain and she immediately dropped the act. "What's wrong?"

Narcissa looked at her having caught on at the hint of worry that her sister expressed. "I just have a headache."

Bellatrix peered at her and then bit her lip. "I have something for that…"

Narcissa gave a slow nod and was a little surprised when Bellatrix reached down and took her hand, fingers entwining.

"Come with me," she said and Narcissa grimaced.

"Bella, my head hurts."

"I know but," she gently pulled her along. "Just come with me."

It would be dinner soon and a perfect time for them to slip away. Narcissa let her sister lead her half-heartedly and wondered where they were going. She took her to a part of the school she hadn't been before and from the dim lighting and empty corridors, Narcissa gathered that this part was barely used.

"Bella," Narcissa whispered as they went down a small corridor and then turned to the left facing a thick bolted door. "Bella, what are we doing?"

"Wait and see," Bellatrix said and took out her wand. "_Alohomora_," she muttered and the door unlocked and Bellatrix heaved it open. She walked in, lighting her wand and Narcissa hesitated then followed her. She glanced around and couldn't stop her lips from kicking up at the corners. The place was a bit dusty and more like a storage room that was clearly abandoned but Bellatrix had tried to decorate it as much as possible and even included some white roses that she knew Narcissa loved in a vase.

"I was going to go to the Room of Requirement but that can be rather troublesome," Bellatrix said scrunching up her nose. "So, here we are. It's a bit make-shift but will have to do."

Bellatrix lit some candles that were around and then went and sat on the bed she had transfigured from an old table. Narcissa asked how she found out about it walking over to the roses and touching their petals gently.

"Rodolphus let it slip," she said casually, slipping off her shoes. "No one comes here and even the ghosts barely venture down this way. Except the Baron but not down this corridor anyway."

"Rodolphus?"

"Yes," Bellatrix said not expanding further. She patted the space next to her and Narcissa went over. "Does your head still hurt?"

"Yes," Narcissa said and Bellatrix gathered her up in her arms and lay down. "Bella, what are we doing here?"

"We need some time together, I thought that was obvious," she said brushing some of Narcissa's hair back. "I thought you'd like the idea."

"I do," Narcissa murmured closing her eyes. It was want she needed, to lie with Bellatrix and just be. She felt Bellatrix shift and press her lips faintly down her neck then back up to her jaw and then over her mouth. "It's such a shame that we discovered this place so late," she mumbled against her lips. "Could have saved so much time…"

"Yes," Narcissa breathed and even though her head throbbed, her hands played with the buttons on Bellatrix's shirt and then popped them open.

"I guess we can take what we have," Bellatrix skimmed her hands under Narcissa's shirt and cupped her breasts through her bra. "Just a little bit tonight."

Narcissa brought her lips back down to hers in silent agreement.

**/x/**

The next morning they went down to the Great Hall together and slid into the empty seats at their table. Bellatrix reached out taking up a copy of the _Prophet_ on the table and Narcissa slowly buttered her toast, peeking at the headlines. Bellatrix scanned the contents until she heard the familiar screech of the owls that came in to deliver post. She looked up expectantly and sure enough their family owl swooped in a dropped a letter in front of Bellatrix.

Narcissa tried to peer over her sister's shoulder but Bellatrix kept shrugging her off so she huffed and waited, watching her sister's expression. Bellatrix's eyes darted down the contents and her eyes widened then she laughed a little before smirking. She folded the letter back up and tucked it into her pocket getting to her feet.

"Where are you going?" Narcissa stood up as well. "Who was that from?"

"You can stay, I need to reply to this," Bellatrix said barely looking back at her as she hurriedly walked out of the Hall. Narcissa stood there feeling rather ridiculous and sat down, bending her head away from the people that looked at her.

"Good news?" a voice said behind her and she gave a small shrug as Lucius sat next to her.

"I assume so," Narcissa picked at her toast with a frown. "What do you and the rest of your group get up to? Bellatrix never tells me anything."

Lucius looked slightly uncomfortable and even glanced to see that Bellatrix hadn't just popped back again. "If she hasn't told you anything then I can't tell you."

"Please?" she pouted, giving him her sweet face. He laughed but shook his blond head all the same.

"No, I'm not risking your sister."

"Seems like no one does. I'm surprised you're scared of her," she added with a hint of spite and Lucius gave her a look.

"You haven't seen her Narcissa," he said quietly. "You haven't seen _her_."

"I think I know my sister better than you," she retorted.

"You see a part of her I'm sure," he said silkily and she glared at him.

"I can see why my sister's hate you," she snapped but he just raised his eyebrow a little.

"And you don't?"

She opened her mouth but then closed it. No, she didn't hate him. She had even enjoyed his company the few times that they had been together but she wasn't going to tell him that. Instead she just scowled at him and got up, leaving him smiling slightly watching her go.

She questioned Bellatrix later when they lay in the room that they called theirs but Bellatrix was reluctant to give any details other than that it was a letter from a friend. Narcissa raised her eyebrow, as far as she knew Bellatrix didn't have any 'friends' and when they went back to the dorm she tried to have a sneaky look at it. Unfortunately Bellatrix had hidden it well, obviously knowing that Narcissa's curiosity would get the better of her. The next day another letter came and the same look of delight crossed her sister's face. It was those letters that, later, Narcissa viewed as early shaping of Bellatrix's life.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** reviews are love x


	10. Chapter 10

**Title:** The Sweetest Poison in the Blood - Part X

**Author:** themirrorofsin

**Ship:** Bellatrix/Narcissa, with background Lucius/Narcissa, Bellatrix/Rodolphus

**Genre(s):** Romance/Hurt/Comfort

**Rating**: M/ NC 17

**Summary**: "_Shaking with aguish fear, and pain, she kissed and kissed her with a hungry mouth_."

**Warning:** Incest, sex, mentions of sex between minors, mentions of abuse, language, self-harm.

**A/N**: Sorry about taking a while - RL is getting a bit busy with uni and all. But thank you for the reviews and I hope you enjoy!

Part X

In a Wonderland they lie,

Dreaming as the days go by,

Dreaming as the summers die

- _Life Is But A Dream_, Lewis Carroll

Summer

Narcissa wandered into Bellatrix's room finding her writing a letter at her desk. She draped her arms around her and rested her chin lightly on her shoulder.

"What are you writing?"

"A note to some people," Bellatrix murmured finishing it off and folded it. "What are you doing here?"

"I was bored," Narcissa said straightening and wandered around before she settled on the end of Bellatrix's bed. "I thought we could so something."

"Once I have posted this," she placed the letter into the envelope and then tied it onto the family owl that was perched at her window. They both watched the owl take flight, soaring in the cloudless sky and then Bellatrix turned back to her. "What did you have in mind?"

"We could go out," Narcissa suggested. "It's a nice day and I'm bored inside."

"You have been saying you're bored all summer," Bellatrix commented running her hands through her hair.

"That's because it's true," Narcissa frowned. "You haven't been around much."

"I know, I've had stuff to do."

"With this group," she said with some resentment and Bellatrix rolled her eyes.

"Don't start Narcissa. This is a good thing."

"I know it is."

"Good," Bellatrix sighed. "I'm going out later tonight but I won't be too long. It's only supposed to be a short meeting."

Narcissa said nothing but glanced at her hands in her lap and Bellatrix came to sit next to her.

"Narcissa, this is very important to me. What the Dark Lord says is true, our blood status makes us the rulers of all those who are inferior. With this group we can change things," Bellatrix took hold of her hand. "You do understand don't you?"

Narcissa gave a small nod. It wasn't the first time this summer that Bellatrix had begun to mention what all the past secrecy had been about. She understood the aims proposed, they were promoting values that their family and other noble houses that should be upheld. The only thing Narcissa didn't like was the nights Bellatrix would come back, a manic gleam in her eyes and her praise for this man and his followers that caused her to speak with such ardent. She had never seen her sister so enflamed with something before and the more time Bellatrix was spending with this group, the more Narcissa feared she was going to lose her.

"So," Bellatrix curled a strand of blonde hair around her finger. "Where would you like to go?"

"We could go to the river," Narcissa proposed coming back to the present. "Or we could take a picnic. That would be nice."

"Anything sweetling. Go downstairs and arrange it and I'll be right down," Bellatrix said and Narcissa knew she was dismissing her. Despite the slight irritation she felt with her, she pushed that aside and went to do what she had been told to. She asked her mother who seemed to be in a cordial mood barely registered her youngest daughter, just murmured her permission indifferently as she penned more letters. Andromeda came downstairs at the moment Narcissa had finished packing the basket with the house-elf.

"Where are you going?"

"Oh, um, out," Narcissa shifted and Andromeda eyed the basket. "Picnic."

"Right," she said dryly and Narcissa felt ashamed for not having thought about her.

"Would you like to come?"

Andromeda paused. "Really?"

"Yes," Narcissa lied with a smile. "I was going to ask you."

"Bellatrix too?"

"Yes," Narcissa said brightly. "It will be nice the three of us."

Andromeda hesitated but then gave her a smile went to change quickly whilst Narcissa wondered about her other sister's reaction to this addition. Bellatrix came down five minutes later and opened the back door, calling to Narcissa to come but Narcissa told her to wait a moment.

"Why?"

"Andromeda is coming," Narcissa told her quietly and Bellatrix's face fell and then frowned.

"Why?"

"She saw the basket. I felt awful for not asking her – it will be nice," Narcissa insisted as Bellatrix rolled her eyes. Andromeda came down just then and Narcissa took it upon herself to keep both her sister's happy.

They headed towards the river, crossing the little bridge and decided to sit under the shade of a tree nearby. Bellatrix unrolled the blanket and sat whilst Narcissa unpacked with Andromeda's help. Narcissa tactfully sat between them and Bellatrix laid her head in her lap after they ate, stretched out on her back with her eyes closed.

Unconsciously Narcissa stroked her hair with one hand whilst she popped a few grapes into her mouth and then Bellatrix's after she demanded one. Andromeda lay on her front, twirling a blade of grass between her fingers. It was peaceful and calm between the sisters for once, Bellatrix and Andromeda even managed to talk without snapping at each other. The only slight tension came from when Narcissa asked what time Bellatrix was leaving tonight. Andromeda cast a flinty glance at her older sister who opened her mouth to give a biting resort but then glanced at Narcissa and held back.

More than once, when Andromeda wasn't looking or had her back to them, did they touch fleetingly and give secret glances. There was something thrilling about the fear of being caught. Something dangerous and oddly stimulating. If Andromeda sensed anything she gave no indication, even though her words from a past conversation rang in Narcissa's ears as she felt Bellatrix brush her back lightly. Eventually they went home and Andromeda smiled at them both as she went into her bedroom and Narcissa was glad to see her sister in a happier mood. Bellatrix, she knew, had grown bored but that couldn't be helped. She went into her room and Bellatrix followed closing the door.

"That was nice," Narcissa commented brushing her hair quickly. Bellatrix sighed, settling on her bed and patted the space next to her.

"Still would have preferred it if it was just us," she said as Narcissa crawled over and lay next to her.

"I know but I couldn't turn her down. She looked happy today," Narcissa murmured and her fingers played with the buttons on Bellatrix's blouse.

"You try to please everyone too much," Bellatrix muttered and stopped her hand. "We can't, not now."

"But you don't have to go for another couple of hours," Narcissa complained sitting up.

"We're not exactly alone," Bellatrix raised her eyebrow. "Andromeda could come in at any time."

"We've done stuff before with her in the house."

"Yes, but then we knew for sure she won't bother us. Today, since she came out with us, she might want to spend more time," Bellatrix said and Narcissa huffed.

"We don't have to take our clothes off," Narcissa offered and Bellatrix laughed.

"Oh Narcissa, you're really eager for a virgin."

Narcissa glowered, hating it when her sister pointed that out. But the idea obviously interested Bellatrix who pulled her down, even though Narcissa tried to wriggle away, and kissed her until she stopped trying to escape. Calling true to Bellatrix's words, Andromeda did come knocking and although the two sisters were composed and casual, the air thrummed with an undercurrent that even Andromeda wasn't oblivious to. Her eyes darted between her sisters and yet nothing seemed wrong between them and she couldn't place whatever it was that was going on. Eventually Bellatrix left them alone, bored again and went to get dressed for the evening. Narcissa didn't see her leave, she was talking to Andromeda at the time and then later went to bed as she could no longer stay up for Bellatrix as the clock showed that it was nearing two in the morning.

**/x/**

A warm and persistent mouth was pulling Narcissa out of her dreams and groggily she turned towards the body that was pressed against her.

"Bella?" she mumbled sleepily and received a kiss on her shoulder.

"Narcissa," she breathed, her breath hot against her skin and Narcissa cracked open her eyes. The room was dim, the faint light from outside coming through the curtains and as her eyes adjusted she was aware that Bellatrix was naked in her bed.

"What time is it?" she rubbed her eyes and Bellatrix's mouth cruised down her arm, her hands sliding underneath her nightdress.

"Nearly four," Bellatrix whispered and pulled the gown off of her, tossing it onto the floor. Narcissa didn't resist, not complaining as her hands roamed over her but was undoubtedly curious.

"I thought it was supposed to be a short meeting?" Narcissa touched her without thinking.

"Mmm went on for longer than I thought. Then I had stuff to talk to Lestrange about," Bellatrix murmured absently, more focused on pressing her lips down the valley between Narcissa's breasts.

"Oh," Narcissa breathed no longer focusing on Bellatrix's words. "What stuff?"

"Doesn't matter," Bellatrix flicked her tongue out to taste her. "Mmm."

It was erotic to be touched and kissed like this in the dark. Bellatrix moved above her and although she could hardly see her, her other senses were heightened. There was something different about Bellatrix tonight, darker and more seductive in the way she spoke and touched her. Narcissa would have questioned her more had she been able to think when Bellatrix licked and then sucked at her nipples. She moaned and Bellatrix pressed her hand over her mouth, muffling the sounds until she was able to cast a silencing spell. It was one of the great perks of being able to do magic freely now.

"You're trying to distract me," Narcissa panted threading her fingers through Bellatrix's hair.

"Then let me," Bellatrix nipped the underside of her breast. "Hell, I want you."

Narcissa shivered as her body heat up and Bellatrix pressed her naked breasts against hers. She hooked her finger and dragged Narcissa's knickers down her legs, the last piece of clothing gone. Narcissa gasped as she had never been naked to Bellatrix before and Bellatrix kissed her neck before sliding her body down a little bit. She littered kisses across her side down to her hip and then back up her stomach and then kissed her mouth once again.

"Bella," Narcissa sighed and ran her hands over sister's body in the dark. Her hands cupped her breasts then down her stomach, over her hips and the curve of her arse. She kissed her as her hand went between their bodies and felt her wet and aching. Bellatrix groaned in her mouth as Narcissa's fingers played over her and then slid inside. Bellatrix rolled her hips, straddling her and opened her legs wider and moaned her name over.

Narcissa thrust her fingers inside, rubbing her thumb over her clit and gazed at her sister moving above her, sucking in breaths. It made Narcissa's own sex throb and she was aware of how wet she was becoming and wished she could do something about it.

"Bella," she whispered and when her sister didn't react she withdrew her hand making her sister growl in frustration. Nevertheless, her sister gazed at her with eyes slightly unfocused and brushed a curl back off Narcissa's face. "Bella, please touch me."

Bellatrix shook her head fiercely but moved and slid her thigh between Narcissa's leg and pressed herself down on Narcissa's thigh. Bellatrix rocked back and forth, gazing at her and slowly Narcissa began to do the same and it sent sparks over her body.

"Ohh," she panted, moving her hips faster and Bellatrix rode her thigh harder building back her orgasm.

She gasped her name in three syllables, kissing her mouth fiercely as she did, tongues darting out and teeth nipping her lips and neck. They writhed, hands gasping, pulling, pressing onto skin and Bellatrix sucked on Narcissa's nipple hard as her sister came with a slightly surprised cry. Bellatrix moaned against her, reaching her own orgasm with a silent cry that had her breath cut short in her throat.

A little while later Narcissa lay with her head against Bellatrix's shoulder as her sister ran her fingers through her hair. It was dawning, the light creeping in and brought them out of the darkness.

"Your hair is beautiful," Bellatrix murmured, letting the blonde strands fall through her fingers. "So beautiful."

Narcissa buried herself closer, inhaling her sister's scent and pressed a little kiss against her skin. She felt weightless and so alive, lingering in the aftermath and not wanting to let it go. She had a small daydream of them both spending all their time like this, trapped in endless summer and pleasure with no worries about what would happen once summer ended.

"My beautiful sister," Bellatrix breathed and Narcissa smiled gently closing her eyes.

**/x/**

Bellatrix reclined in her chair as if it was a throne and she idly played with the ends of Narcissa's hair as she sipped at her cup of tea. There was a gentle and almost romantic quality to Bellatrix's smile and it was reflected on Narcissa's face as well when she gave her sister a glance. Narcissa felt her cheeks heat up as she closed her eyes for a moment, savouring the memory of last night. She felt Bellatrix's fingers brush slowly the sensitive skin under her ear then down her neck making her sigh gently. Bellatrix had woken her up in a similar style, gently stroking over her body and pressing little kisses till she woke and they lay there for a while merely touching lightly, basking in their moment.

Their idyllic time was shattered when Andromeda stormed in, her face a mask of barely controlled fury and she flung down a copy of the_ Prophet_ in front of Bellatrix. Bellatrix blinked in slow surprise, cocking her head to the side but didn't remove her hand from where it rested on Narcissa's shoulder.

"Have you seen this?" Andromeda asked scathingly and Bellatrix glanced at the title page. The headlines quoted the disappearances of yet more people and Narcissa's eyes darted back and forth between her sisters.

"Yes, but I still fail to see your point," Bellatrix replied sardonically as if Andromeda was talking about the weather.

"My point," Andromeda seethed, "Is the fact that you know about this. Your group is responsible!"

"My, those are strong accusations," Bellatrix murmured and then slid her fingers up Narcissa's neck watching her sister's eyes flutter almost shut.

"These are people's lives! Families, friends, how can you do this?"

"I have done nothing," Bellatrix replied smoothly.

"But you support this rubbish about blood purity and a war against Muggle-borns and Muggles," Andromeda spat and Bellatrix's eyes flashed.

"Rubbish?" she echoed and Narcissa tensed but did not move as Bellatrix's fingers pressed slowly against her pulse. "Rubbish that our family should not be tainted by dirty blood? Rubbish that we, purebloods, are subjected to live alongside these worthless beings as 'equals'?"

A shiver ran through Narcissa's body, her sister's voice was dangerously low and her calm was more unnerving than her rage.

"You disgust me," Andromeda said finally and Bellatrix's lips turned into a hateful smile.

"Tell me, Narcissa," the blonde jerked at the mention of her name and the fact she was being drawn into this. "What is worse? Fighting to defend your family, or disgracing it by whoring with a Mudblood?"

"You fucking-"

"Tut, tut, Narcissa here hasn't answered the question Andromeda," Bellatrix chided mockingly and both sister's looked at their youngest sibling.

Narcissa swallowed looking between them and was painfully aware of Bellatrix's fingers skimming her collarbone, tracing little patterns over her skin. It was a gesture that wasn't lost by Andromeda who tracked the movements and then looked at her youngest sister questioningly.

"Well?" Bellatrix pressed and Narcissa couldn't look at them.

"I-"

"Let's put it this way shall we? Would you betray your family?" Bellatrix asked and Narcissa shook her head. "Then, would you fuck a Mudblood?"

"No," Narcissa said quickly, too quickly and she saw Andromeda's eyes close for a second. "I-"

"Well, there you have it," Bellatrix smirked and leaned in a little closer to Narcissa.

"I would rather that then the incestuous relationship you have. Tell me, _Bella_, what would the family think was the greater evil here?"

For a moment neither sister moved or spoke but then Bellatrix tipped her head back and laughed loudly till tears formed in her eyes.

"Oh Andromeda, you poor deluded girl. You clearly have not looked at Aunt Walburga's tapestry carefully," Bellatrix wound Narcissa's hair around her finger again. "Besides, there's nothing here other than your sick imaginings."

"I hate you," Andromeda said vehemently and Narcissa's lips parted in a small gasp. "Both of you."

"The feeling is mutual," Bellatrix didn't look at her sister but smiled gently at Narcissa. "How about we go out? Maybe get you a new robe?"

"Bella…" Narcissa said weakly and looked at Andromeda who drew herself up and wiped her angry tears away.

"Don't think about her Cissa," Bellatrix leaned in ever closer and her voice was low. "She means nothing to us. She would put Mudbloods over us. It's just you and me – as it always should have been. As it always will be."

"Narcissa," Andromeda placed her hand on her shoulder and yanked her back. "Narcissa, don't listen to her, _please_."

Bellatrix stood up, facing her sister and Narcissa's eyes widened as Bellatrix withdrew her wand and pointed it at Andromeda. She got to her feet as well, standing between them with an imploring expression on her face.

"Bella, please! Just put your wand down," she pleaded.

"What will you do Bella? Curse me? Torture me? _Kill_ me?" Andromeda taunted her with a small laugh of her own. "Will you do to me what you do to all those innocent people?"

Bellatrix scoffed, "You think I won't?"

"No!" Narcissa moved directly in front of Bellatrix and clasped her wrist trying to get her to lower her wand. "Stop this the both of you!"

"I want nothing more to do with you," Andromeda told her and Bellatrix inclined her head.

"Likewise."

Andromeda cast a final look back at Narcissa who almost moved to go to her but her feet seemed to be fixed to the floor. "Andromeda…"

"Oh, and you will leave Narcissa alone," Bellatrix called after her before she left and Andromeda slowed, turning back.

"She is my sister as well."

"No," Bellatrix said firmly tugging Narcissa towards her. "She will have nothing more to do with you."

"Bella!" Narcissa tried to protest, hating that they were discussing her as if she wasn't there.

"Well, will you force her to choose?" Andromeda snapped but Bellatrix laughed.

"I don't have to," Bellatrix's arm snaked around Narcissa's waist drawing her back until her front was pressed against Narcissa's back. "She will always choose me."

"And if she doesn't?" Andromeda asked and Bellatrix tightened her hold.

"She is _mine_. _My_ Narcissa."

The utter possessiveness in her voice made both Andromeda and Narcissa gape and Narcissa turned in Bellatrix's grip to look at her and Bellatrix stared at her. Her eyes bore into her and she felt the air in her lungs leave as she saw wildfire dance in those dark orbs.

"You _are_ mine," she whispered, her hands stroking her back and Narcissa felt herself drowning. Wordlessly Andromeda shook her head, lips parted in shock and she turned hurriedly away, not waiting a second more to hear if Narcissa would protest. She knew that she wouldn't.

"Bella," Narcissa managed to breathe and Bellatrix smiled darkly lowering her head.

"Mine," she murmured and kissed her in a way that Narcissa completely succumbed to her, hopelessly falling further and further into the dark.

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><p><strong>AN:** Please review - reviews are love x


	11. Chapter 11

**Title:** The Sweetest Poison in the Blood - Part XI

**Author:** themirrorofsin

**Ship:** Bellatrix/Narcissa, with background Lucius/Narcissa, Bellatrix/Rodolphus

**Genre(s):** Romance/Hurt/Comfort

**Rating**: M/ NC 17

**Summary**: "_Shaking with aguish fear, and pain, she kissed and kissed her with a hungry mouth_."

**Warning:** Incest, sex, mentions of sex between minors, mentions of abuse, language, self-harm.

A/N:

A HUGE apology for how long it this has taken. Uni was a bit hectic and I have been procrastinating like no tomorrow on tumblr (link on my profile) as well as doing other fanfics/fanmixes. Hopefully I will get back into the flow of this.

Broke this chapter up because it was getting rather long.

Thank you SO much to all the reviews – so glad that you are all enjoying this!

Part XI

Come to me in my dreams, and then

By day I shall be well again!

For so the night will more than pay

The hopeless longing of the day.

- _Longing_, Matthew Arnold

The gentle rocking of the train did nothing to comfort her or ease the gnawing emptiness and nerves she felt inside. She had never felt so alone as she did sitting in the small compartment curled up on the seat and watching the scenery shift and fade into sprawling landscapes that she couldn't appreciate. It only made her more painfully aware of how far apart she was from her and whereas her sister was starting something new, _something without her_, she was stuck on this train.

Bellatrix hadn't come to say goodbye.

Narcissa had hoped that she would just appear at the last minute but she never did and it was on the last blow of the whistle that she boarded the Hogwarts Express. Andromeda was elsewhere on the train, not wanting to be anywhere near her and no one else spoke to her. Without Bellatrix now Narcissa was truly alone as, ever since her arrival at Hogwarts, she had spent very little time making any real friends, preferring the company of her sister.

She told herself she wouldn't cry and curled up tighter pressing her forehead against the cold glass of the window and closed her eyes. It must have been at least an hour in when the door of her compartment was knocked on before sliding open. She peered up to find Lucius Malfoy walking in and sit down opposite her, elegant as ever and dressed in his school robes. For a moment neither spoke and she was fully aware that he was taking in her melancholic demeanour.

"You miss her," he stated and Narcissa glanced at him unable to read anything in his expression.

"She is my sister…" she said softly. "I haven't been without her for so long."

He noticed the pain that she didn't hide in her eyes and felt both intrigued and cautious of this girl.

"Your world really does revolve around her," he murmured and she looked away from him.

"She is my sister," she said again plainly but Lucius couldn't help but think that it was so much more than that.

He didn't know what it was that was between them but the bond between Narcissa and Bellatrix was one he had never seen before. There was no such bond with the other sister and he remembered over the summer when he had met with Bellatrix and enquired after Narcissa… the sharpness of her eyes, the bite of her words with the unveiled threat reminded him that for her, Bellatrix would undoubtedly kill for. He inwardly shuddered and then wondered if the girl in front of him had any idea of the woman that her sister was becoming.

He inclined his head and she sighed, leaning back and closing her eyes once more. She didn't care if he stayed or if he left and eventually heard the door slide open and shut again. Alone she thought about the night before lying with Bellatrix in her bed with the trunk fully packed and nothing to do but count down the hours till she was on the train for Hogwarts…

/

"Will you miss me?" she asked twirling some of Bellatrix's hair around her finger. Bellatrix lay on her front across the bed with her arms dangling off one side and her feet sticking out the other. Narcissa lay across her so they made a cross and she heard Bellatrix snort at her question so she tugged upon the strand of hair.

"Answer," she insisted and was then jolted as Bellatrix moved onto her back, sliding down so that her head lay on the bed and Narcissa repositioned herself across her stomach.

"You know I will," she murmured running her fingers down her sister's bare arm. Bellatrix only wore the bird skull necklace. Every other piece of clothing has been stripped off earlier whilst Narcissa had only her dark green knickers on (at Bellatrix's insistence). "And will you miss me sweetling?"

Narcissa wriggled up so that she leaned over her and gently nudged her nose with her own. "_Of_ _course_ I will."

Bellatrix smiled slowly bringing her hand up to stroke her face and neck gently. Narcissa leaned down further so that she could kiss her and they did languidly as if they had all the time in the world.

"Will you be there tomorrow?" Narcissa murmured trailing small kisses over her sister's neck. There were rules about how much they could do, rules that Bellatrix had stated to keep herself in check as they were both painfully aware of Narcissa's age.

"No," she said and Narcissa drew back into a sitting position.

"No?" she repeated her shoulders slumping.

"No," Bellatrix said again and brushed some of her dark hair off of her face.

"But I won't see you until Christmas," Narcissa protested looking upset.

Bellatrix gave a small shrug. "That's not my fault. But I just can't…"

"Why?"

Bellatrix looked away bringing one hand up to fiddle with her necklace. A habit Narcissa had noticed she did whenever she felt worried or unsure. Her tone was soft when she next spoke, soft and sad which made Narcissa lie down and wrap her arms about her.

"I hate goodbyes. I won't say it."

"I won't make you," Narcissa murmured pressing a small kiss on her shoulder. Though she secretly hoped that, come the morning, her sister would change her mind. Bellatrix didn't reply but squeezed her hand and after a long stretch of silence whispered goodnight as she repositioned them on the bed and tugged up the covers around them.

When Narcissa woke she was alone, all traces of her sister gone, and she reached out to place her hand over the empty space where she should have been. The sharp click of heels sounded outside and then her door was pushed open and her mother came in.

"Narcissa, it is time to get up and ready," Druella announced and then Narcissa noticed her mother's brow crease. She clutched the covers though she was fully covered from her mother's sight and she darted her eyes to the side.

"Mother?" she questioned lightly and the frown disappeared and her mother straightened.

"Come on, you have a train to catch," she told her and turned to leave.

"Is Bella up?" she said without thinking and Druella paused at the door, one hand tightly gripping the handle.

"She left this morning for Merlin knows where," she replied with a trace of irritation and then swept out of the room. Narcissa sat up feeling her heart sink. She wasn't even at home to see her off… She got out of bed and then caught sight of herself in the mirror. Her lips still looked swollen from last night and there was a strange look in her eyes, a desire that had not waned. She rubbed her face and lips with a sigh then went to find her clothes, her skin pricking at the brush of the cool air in the room. She'd have to get used to being alone, she thought brushing her hair gently whilst her heart grew heavy with the thought in her chest.

/x/

It was oddly easy slipping back into the way of Hogwarts life though there was a huge hole there that couldn't be filled. The first couple of days she moved around like a ghost barely speaking to anyone. She tried once to find Andromeda but when she did she faltered and turned away. Things were still tense between them and with Bellatrix no longer there she noticed her sister openly prided herself with those that were so beneath them that Narcissa felt it sting at her own pride. Her sister was shaming their family with what she was doing and this made Narcissa determined to uphold everything that she been taught by her family. The first shaping of her cool guise began to form that September.

Narcissa still felt a little let down that Bellatrix hadn't come to see her, a part of her had hoped that even with the last whistle that she would appear but she hadn't. She got the usual letter from her parents when she first arrived but nothing from her sister and it was now the end of her first week. She sat at the Slytherin table in the morning, picking at some toast when the familiar screech of owls filled the hall. Heads perked up from students that had been half-asleep and letters and parcels were soon dropped onto tables and laps. Narcissa flicked a look up when a letter landed in front of her and she picked it up slowly. The handwriting on the front made her heart leap and she eagerly ripped it and pulled out the short letter inside. There were just two lines written in that bold scrawl that read:

_I miss you,_

_Bellatrix_

Narcissa frowned and then a huge smile covered her face as another owl dropped a box and a group of house-elves appeared carrying bigger parcels to her. She had attracted the attention of nearly everyone on the Hall, even some of the professors were looking curiously as the youngest Black girl had presents piled up where she sat. Narcissa felt her cheeks heat up in delight as she gathered the gifts wondering which ones to open first.

"Seems you haven't been forgotten," came the silky voice of Lucius who sat three spaces down and she bent her head a little still blushing and tucked the note safely into her pocket.

She was too excited to notice their family owl had dropped a letter by Malfoy and that it was also written by her sister. Lucius hide the letter and glanced over at Narcissa who was balancing the packages in her arms. The Bellatrix he knew seemed a complete contrast to the doting sister that sent her sister presents to let her know she was thinking of her. It was then that he realised that Narcissa was Bellatrix's Achilles' heel and he wondered if Bellatrix was Narcissa's.

Some girls that had attempted to become her friends early on now piped up, asking if she needed help carrying it all back to the dormitories. She accepted but had no intention of letting them help her unwrap them. In her bed later with the curtains drawn close she opened them all and smiled softly before writing a long letter back whilst she daydreamed about seeing her again.

/x/

If people expected her to be like her older sister then they were surprised by how reserved and quiet she was in comparison. With Bellatrix around no one had tried to get to know her, classing her in the same way they did her sister. But now they could see that she was not Bellatrix. At least on the surface. She had familiar traits that many members of her extensive family had. Proud and brought up with the ideology of their own superiority it wasn't a surprise to see the small number of people Narcissa actually spent her time with were remnants of her sister's group. She found herself with constant admirers but turned them all down with a cool grace, fully aware that every time she did there were more and more whispers of her being termed as an 'ice queen'.

The professors too soon discovered that although gifted, Narcissa was not as talented as her sister either. Bellatrix's magical ability was both fascinating and frightening but Narcissa was less inclined to master spells that even professors had difficulty with. Her sister's shadow no longer cloaked her but she didn't all together step out of it, keeping it close for safety.

/x/

"Will you come then?"

Narcissa considered him as she got off the train with her luggage trying to step out of the way of the happy reunions happening on the platform.

"Perhaps," she answered evenly and Lucius's lips moved a little in the corners. "I will see."

"Of course," he said and straightened. "If you do-"

He was cut off when Narcissa's face suddenly lit up and hurried past him leaving him to turn and see Bellatrix standing there with a smirk on her face. Narcissa all but ran towards her and threw herself against her. Bellatrix wrapped her arms around her protectively and Narcissa squeezed.

"You are here," she breathed excitedly gazing up whilst Bellatrix's grin widened. "But where is mother?"

"I thought I might surprise you. They are waiting at home," she replied smoothing back a strand of her sister's blonde hair then she glanced over at Lucius and her smile dropped.

"Oh," Narcissa turned back to the boy. "I will give you my answer by owl."

"Yes," Lucius said but wasn't looking at her. "Bellatrix."

"Malfoy," she replied coolly. "Not backing out of the meeting on Tuesday are you?"

"Not at all," he answered tersely which only made Bellatrix smirk again. Narcissa looked between them with a small from.

"What meeting?"

"Just a group of old friends," Bellatrix said lightly reaching down to clasp her hand. "But we've got to go home."

They gathered her things and without a goodbye Bellatrix tugged Narcissa along. For a moment she turned her head and saw that Lucius was still standing there and she felt sad for him. He looked lonely standing there but she soon forgot that when she heard Bellatrix whisper her name in that certain way which made her skin tingle.

"What about Andromeda?" Narcissa asked uncertainly and a shadow came and went across her sister's face. She motioned with her head and Narcissa saw her sister standing near the gateway her face masked. Andromeda picked up her things and followed her sisters not exchanging a word with either of them. Even when they got to their house she took herself upstairs and shut the door leaving her sisters still standing in the hallway.

"Bella," Narcissa whispered and Bellatrix raised her eyebrow in question and blinked as Narcissa wrapped her arms around her and pressed a kiss against her cheek.

"I'm glad you came. I missed you."

/x/

But being back home was not as perfect as she had imagined. Her parents were notably absent or spent their time talking behind closed doors with their aunt and uncle. Sometimes Narcissa could hear voices being raised and heard her mother protesting whilst her father tried to reason with her. Bellatrix took off at odd hours and every time she came she went straight to her side, kissing her and embracing her as if her life depended on it. Narcissa occasionally saw fading bruises on her skin and once she came to her with a bloodied lip and dried blood on her hands. She wiped her hands and Bellatrix said nothing and Narcissa didn't question. Sometimes her sister didn't sleep, she sat up in her bed staring out into the dark whilst Narcissa lay by her side. She would wake to find her so still and silent, limbs locked and she would rise and gently kiss her to bring her back. And she always came back to her.

/x/

"Are you going to the New Year's party?"

Bellatrix didn't even look up as she lazily stretched on the bed. Narcissa shut the door behind her and sat on the edge holding the letter in hand.

"Unfortunately."

"If you don't enjoy it why do you go?"

"Because some of those people are," she paused. "Well, they are needed."

"For?" Narcissa prompted but Bellatrix sat up and got out of bed wandering to her wardrobe to find something to wear.

"You want to go?" she asked pulling out a black dress to consider. Narcissa wondered how her sister told some of her dresses apart. They were nearly all black and of a similar style but she guessed they suited her.

"Well, Lucius did invite me," she spoke and then realised what she said and saw her sister tense. She knew that Bellatrix hated talking about Lucius – why she hadn't yet figured out – and she certainly didn't tell her sister that Lucius had crossed her mind a couple of times. He was arrogant and aloof but he had been rather kind to her and he was handsome and a pureblood. Those things did not seem so terrible to her and if he was part of Bellatrix's group then surely he held the right beliefs?

"Bella?" she asked hesitantly and Bellatrix shot her a look back.

"Speaking a lot to Malfoy are you?" she asked with a hard edge to her voice. She pulled off her nightdress and tossed it aside before yanking the dress off the hanger and stepped into it. Narcissa snagged her bottom lip between her teeth before getting up to help her do up the dress. Bellatrix observed herself in the mirror, turning from left to right as Narcissa finished and then took the brush off the dresser to carefully comb Bellatrix's hair.

"I hardly speak to him," Narcissa murmured dragging the brush through the dark mass. "But he is one of the few at Hogwarts who is of a good bloodline," she added knowing that Bellatrix couldn't disagree with that.

Her sister snorted then moved out of Narcissa's reach, raking her hands through her hair and shaking it up a little. Narcissa went to sit back on the bed watching her find her stockings and boots. She was going out again, Narcissa thought, though she won't tell me where or with whom. Bellatrix raised an eyebrow as she caught her sister's look and then rolled her eyes before picking up her wand and long black coat.

"Don't look at me like that sweetling, I won't be long."

"You always say that."

"Well, this time I mean it," Bellatrix told her absently and patted her on the head making Narcissa feel like a child.

"Don't," she huffed but it only made Bellatrix laugh.

"I'm not ruining your hair precious," she leaned down to that her face was level with hers. "Come on, don't strop like a child."

"I'm _not_. You keep leaving me," she replied sounding exactly that which only made Bellatrix smirk.

"Hmm and here I was going to tell you that we are going to that Malfoy party."

Narcissa's eyes lightened immediately. "Really? We are?"

"Yes," Bellatrix straightened with a small frown and Narcissa stood and wrapped her arms around her waist.

"Thank you," she murmured as she squeezed and for a moment Bellatrix didn't react then she stroked her hair.

"I have to go."

They walked out onto the corridor and Bellatrix pulled her door shut then locked it – her fear of anyone going through her things had made her place multiple spells around her room to guard her privacy.

"I love you," Narcissa whispered to her and Bellatrix looked back at her with a closed expression though her eyes seemed to pierce right through her.

"I love you more than anything Narcissa, never forget that. I am the only person that will ever love you like that."

Her words made Narcissa pause but Bellatrix was already gone before she could reply. A small shiver passed through her as she went back into her own room and shut the door tight.

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><p><strong>AN:** Reviews are love x


	12. Chapter 12

**Title:** The Sweetest Poison in the Blood - Part XII

**Author:** themirrorofsin

**Ship:** Bellatrix/Narcissa, with background Lucius/Narcissa, Bellatrix/Rodolphus

**Genre(s):** Romance/Hurt/Comfort

**Rating:** M/ NC 17

**Summary:** "Shaking with aguish fear, and pain, she kissed and kissed her with a hungry mouth."

**Warning:** Incest, sex, mentions of sex between minors, mentions of abuse, language, self-harm.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** A HUGE apology for the wait. Life has been a mess and other fandoms took over. I hope you enjoy and I will try to update again soon!

* * *

><p>Part XII<p>

_I love you with a passion_

_Terrible and odd_

- Baudelaire

She was aware that she was staring but she could not stop herself. The manor was beautiful, extravagant and breath-taking. In the perfectly kept gardens large marquees had been set up and inside the place had been decorated with festive garlands and the chandeliers gleamed in the light making the place so inviting. So many people walked around, some danced to orchestral music and others grouped together in secluded corners they found.

"You are gawping," Bellatrix hissed at her and Narcissa blushed but still let her eyes revolve over it all. The Malfoys had no problem in displaying their wealth it seemed and Narcissa felt a pang of envy at the beauty that she saw all around her. She wished that her family presented themselves like this, glittering and bright.

She was glad that she had taken Bellatrix's advice and dressed in her deep royal blue gown because, as she glanced around, quite a few women were wearing shades of green. Or black, Narcissa added which was her sister's chosen shade. But instead of fading her, Bellatrix was as beautiful as ever. It made Narcissa felt both proud and a little jealous that many glanced and lingered over her dark sister. What she wasn't aware of was that then those glances would fall on her and stay a little longer than just a casual look.

"Miss Black," a voice announced and Narcissa turned her head to see a tall man with golden hair standing before them. He gave of a presence of commanding attention easily and he was still a handsome man, dressed perfectly in black robes with dark green silk lining. He had addressed her sister and as Narcissa cast her eyes over his face she knew that this was Lucius' father.

Bellatrix gave a tight smile and dipped her head, "Mr Malfoy."

Abraxas turned his attention to her and was about to speak when Lucius came up to his side followed by a tall and coolly elegant woman. If she thought Lucius' father impressive then his wife was more so. Despite the coldness in her stature she was enchanting and Narcissa instantly felt in awe of her.

"Ah, Lucius, you might introduce us," Abraxas said as his wife moved to his right side and let her eyes travel over Narcissa from head to toe.

"Father, mother, this is Narcissa Black," Lucius said and she shot him a small smile before smiling at his parents.

"Enchanted," Abraxas said taking her hand and his wife gave a flicker of a smile.

"Lucius has spoken much about you," she said and her tone was smooth and light. Narcissa saw her sister snort a little into her champagne glass and blushed again. "Your dress is lovely."

"Thank you," she replied and opened her mouth to return the compliment but Lucius' mother was look at her sister instead.

"Bellatrix, how lovely to see you," she said and this time Narcissa noticed that her voice was not as distant as it had been with her. Bellatrix smirked without a reply and tipped back the rest of her drink.

"Lucius, maybe you should get Miss Black another drink?" Abraxas asked but Bellatrix shook her head.

"Don't bother," she muttered and took off without another word. A second passed before Mrs Malfoy murmured her excuses and Narcissa watched as she followed her sister through the crowd. If Lucius and his father were at all perplexed by that, neither of them showed it and Narcissa stood awkwardly with the two men.

"Perhaps then Lucius you would show Miss Black around?" Abraxas suggested after a moment and left them.

/x/

Lucius led her around the ground floor, murmuring sometimes things about the portraits that watched them with some curiosity. Narcissa wasn't really listening though, her eyes drank in the splendour of the manor and then they stepped out into the gardens. She was acutely aware that he was watching her causing to feel something close to a flattered bewilderment as he gently touched her arm steering them down the garden path. She had not said much as they walked, a pleasant silence between them as they wound through other couples and back to the manor steps. Through the gathering crowds waiting for the spectacle that would mark the end of the year, they saw Lucius' parents standing central to everyone and the air thrummed with excitement.

"I must find my sister," she said turning to him and he smiled a little.

"Of course," he leaned down, her breath hitched in her chest as he brushed his lips against the corner of her mouth before moving away to stand by his father. Heat enflamed her cheeks and she looked around thinking someone must have seen but no one was watching her as they were transfixed by the Malfoys. Well, all except the dark eyes of her sister who stood still against the movement of the crowd. Bellatrix motioned her head to the right sharply, a command to move and Narcissa bit her lip, following her sister.

As they both untangled themselves from the spectators, Bellatrix sunk her nails into her wrist as she clamped down and dragged her into the manor and down a dark corridor. Narcissa only had a moment to realise how well her sister knew this house before she was shoved into a small alcove and felt her fierce kiss descend. She resisted for a second before she gave in, all the moments with Lucius stripped from her as her sister swept her tongue in her mouth and Narcissa groaned.

"Did you like it?" Bellatrix rasped as she hitched up Narcissa's skirt. Dimly the blonde recognised the countdown begin outside… Twenty… nineteen…

"It was a friendly kiss," she stated turning her head so that her lips could brush down Bellatrix's neck. This was wrong, so very wrong, and dangerous to do anything here when they could be caught… and it was exhilarating.

Sixteen… fifteen…

Bellatrix laughed darkly against her breast, her fingers moved under the silk knickers and rubbed over her. This was new and Narcissa felt a little nervous as Bellatrix circled over her wet skin.

"I want to fuck you so much," Bellatrix said and Narcissa shivered in her arms. Yes, she thought, but not like this. Not here and not now.

"Bella, they will notice," she whispered but Bellatrix pressed her mouth against hers to silence her.

"They won't," she breathed. "Touch me."

Twelve… eleven…ten….

Bellatrix's back was pushed against the stone wall, her hands held her sister close as Narcissa fumbled for a second with her sister's skirts before raising them and slipped her fingers into her. They both groaned as Narcissa began to thrust in and out, Bellatrix's hips rocking with them and sometimes squeezed around her fingers as she came closer to her orgasm.

Seven… six…five…

They panted in between kisses, cutting off moans with their mouths and then Bellatrix gripped Narcissa's face between her hands in a vice like hold. They stared at each other in the semi-darkness, the light glittered their eyes and illuminated their pale skin.

Three… two…

"I love you," Narcissa whispered, aware that her jaw was beginning to ache in her sister's grasp.

One!

Bellatrix stifled her groan as she came against Narcissa's shoulder and slumped into her arms. Narcissa stroked her back with her free hand and listened half to her sister's breaths and the other half to the cheers and the sound of the fireworks. She wasn't sure why she suddenly felt so weary wishing that she could catch a glimpse of the amazing display that was going off right now. Bellatrix held onto her in the dark for a couple of minutes before she slowly drew back.

They straightened themselves, adjusting skirts and hair, wiping traces of what they had just done away and they slowly slipped back out and into the mass. Bellatrix clasped her hand tightly in hers as they caught the last of the show. As Narcissa tipped her head back she felt a tear escape her and then caught sight of Lucius' gaze. She couldn't even offer him a small smile, just held his eyes until she turned back to her sister, moving closer to her and Bellatrix, oblivious to them, wrapped her arm about her waist.

/x/

She rolled her neck against the porcelain rim, settling more comfortably in the hot water and closed her eyes. The events from the night before flashed in sporadic moments behind her eyelids, some hazier than others due to the alcohol which burnt through her veins. She vaguely remembered her sister taking her home or at least taking her away from the manor. She sees in her mind's eye Lucius' face swim up and she frowned, replacing that memory with the one of her sister kissing her in the dark.

She heard the door of the bathroom open and then close before the soft pad of bare feet on the floor. She didn't open her eyes as she heard her strip off her clothes, flinging them without care onto the side. She knew it wouldn't be long before she came to find her and she shifted her legs when she felt her get into the tub, a low hiss at the temperature of the water and then a pleasured moan as she sunk her body into it slowly.

"Fuck, this is good," Bellatrix murmured as she leant back and stretched out her limbs. Narcissa opened her eyes, watching her from the side where her head lay resting on the rim. Unlike her, Bellatrix had not tied her hair up and she watched her duck her head under, her hair spreading out under the water like ink. She came up with a small gasp and wiped the water from her eyes giving her a small smile.

"How's your head?" Narcissa asked running her finger down the bath's side.

"Better, you?"

Narcissa gave a small shrug and silence fell between them. Through half closed eyes, Narcissa watched as her sister's head lolled to the side, her eyes close and an almost blissful expression on her face. Here, Bellatrix looked perfectly content and calm without a trace of that dark fire that Narcissa had seen all too much take hold of her most of the time.

Eventually she gently prodded Bellatrix's side with her foot making her sister open her eyes grudgingly, blinking a couple of times. Narcissa shifted in the water so she was sitting further up and Bellatrix eyed her.

"Bella, what happened last night," she snagged her bottom lip between her teeth for a second. "It can't happen again. Not like that. It was dangerous, too dangerous. Anyone could have walked by and found us…"

"Mmm the excitement," Bellatrix replied brushing a damp strand of hair away from her face. "You liked it."

"Yes," Narcissa blushed. "But Bella it is dangerous."

Bellatrix shrugged her shoulders. "No one noticed we were gone."

That wasn't true and they both knew it. Lucius had noticed they had disappeared and he had noticed when they came back, Bellatrix's eyes ablaze and never leaving her sister. She shivered which caused Bellatrix to sit up and rub her hands down her arms.

"Are you cold?" she asked and moved so that she could wrap her arms about her. The water sloshed over the side and Narcissa almost told her to be careful but it was futile to do so and so she held back the words.

"Don't change the subject," Narcissa turned to her raising her hand to stroke down her face. The water was cooling somewhat and it was about time they got out but Narcissa was far too comfortable. "You were the one who always cautioned me."

"Fuck caution," Bellatrix mumbled her words into her sister's neck as she pressed her lips against the hollow area where neck met shoulder. "Fuck them all."

"Bella, please listen. We can't just do _that_," Narcissa flourished her hand as some sort of explanation. "Please."

"Is it because of Malfoy?" she asked, her voice dangerously pitched and Narcissa swallowed.

"No, no it's not," she dropped her forehead to rest against Bellatrix's dark curls. "This is to do with us."

"Is this your way of telling me you want to stop?" Bellatrix drew back, the calm in her eyes receding to fury. "Because it can never stop. I will _never _stop and neither can you. You cannot give me up remember? I am _everything _to you!"

"Bella," Narcissa smoothed her hands down her face and neck and lowered her voice to a soothing tone. "I did not say that. You do mean everything, just as I mean everything to you?"

Unlike her sister's clear certainty, Narcissa didn't state but question and for a paused moment when Bellatrix didn't reply, Narcissa felt her heart drop in her chest.

"You know you do," she eventually said in a very low voice. Narcissa let out a breath as she sunk back and passed a hand over her face. "But you're right, we do need to be careful."

Bellatrix moved and stood up, water streamed down her body and she stepped out of the bath mindless of all the water she took out with her. Finding a towel she wrapped it tightly around her body and wrung out her hair onto the floor. Then she found another towel and held it out for her and Narcissa allowed her to envelope her into the soft white fabric. Bellatrix just stood there holding her for a while and Narcissa closed her eyes feeling her sister stroke her back.

"Oh, I forgot, why did Mrs Malfoy chase after you last night?" she asked quietly and Bellatrix drew back.

"Just some stuff, boring really," she smiled but it didn't reach her eyes.

"Will you tell me? One day will you tell me?"

Bellatrix sighed and hitched up her towel. "Maybe, probably not."

Narcissa nodded turning her head away and heard her sister pad out before she followed her, not looking at the mess they left behind them.

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><p><strong>AN:** Reviews are love x


	13. Chapter 13

Title: The Sweetest Poison in the Blood - Part XIII

Author: themirrorofsin

Ship: Bellatrix/Narcissa, with background Lucius/Narcissa, Bellatrix/Rodolphus

Genre(s): Romance/Hurt/Comfort

Rating: M/ NC 17

Summary: "Shaking with aguish fear, and pain, she kissed and kissed her with a hungry mouth."

Warning: Incest, sex, mentions of sex between minors, mentions of abuse, language, self-harm.

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><p><strong>AN:** A thousand apologises for how late this is! I have no abandoned this fic but other fandoms, tumblr and uni have been taking up all of my time and I wasn't really feeling them for a long time. However, I do have a rough plan for the next chapters so hopefully the wait for the next part won't be as long as this one was. But thank you to everyone who has reviewed, faved and altered! I hope you like this part.

- another note is that I will be going back to edit a few chapters, tweaking bits. And this fic can be soon found on AO3 (username is themirrorofsin)

- oh and this chapter now brings us back to the present where the 3rd chapter left off.

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><p>Part XIII<p>

Don't leave me, even for an hour, because then

The little drops of anguish will all run together,

The smoke that roams looking for a home will drift

Into me, choking my lost heart.

- Pablo Neruda

1971 (present)

Narcissa sucked in a breath as she stepped off of the train and onto the platform. The rest of her year, since Christmas after her sister's wedding, had a bit of a mess and she was relieved to be away from school. But she wasn't yet sure how she felt about going home. All she kept thinking about was Bellatrix in another house with her husband, possibly together, and that made her stomach turn.

"Cissy!"

She turned and saw her approaching her with quick steps, pushing past anyone without a care. Narcissa grinned, wrapping her arms around her and kissed her cheek. She noted that her sister felt thinner than before and there were faint shadows beneath her eyes. Narcissa inwardly frowned but then peered over Bellatrix's shoulder and saw Rodolphus studying their exchange with some interest. When he caught her eye he gave her a small nod of recognition and she tried to smile – as it was only polite to do so – but her smile could not last for more than a second.

Bellatrix turned to see what or who had captured her sister's attention and then grimaced a little.

"He's here to see Malfoy."

"Oh," Narcissa let her go and Rodolphus came up to them.

"I can see him," he said to Bellatrix who scanned the crowd then fixed her gaze on the tall blond man. "I will see you at some point."

Bellatrix gave a nod and turned her attention back to her sister. Her sister had her eyes to the floor and Bellatrix tipped up her chin so that their eyes met. There was a faint smile on her sister's face and she seemed calm enough so she relaxed a little.

"Come along, I'm bored hanging around here," Bellatrix commented glancing distastefully around at the other families. It that brief moment Narcissa thought that her sister looked very much like their aunt did when out in public, viewing everyone with contempt. It was a trait that Bellatrix seemed to have adopted and Narcissa found herself occasionally behaving in a similar fashion.

"And you still haven't seen my home."

Narcissa's heart dropped as she was less than pleased to think again of her sister as a married woman. Nevertheless, she went with her sister and soon she was standing outside of a large dark-bricked manor house. It was not as grand as that of the Malfoy one, the grounds, she noted, was in dire need of care. The hedges had grown wild, the grass was tall enough to tickle their shins and flowers tumbled out of their beds and were choked by weeds. But it was of little concern to her sister, the up keeping of the gardens nowhere on her list of priorities.

Inside, it was quite dark due to most of the heavy drapes being closed and little had been changed from its state before her sister moved it. As Bellatrix cared nothing for the exterior, it was only natural she wasn't bothered with making this house her own in redecorating or adding any personal touches. In her mind's eye, Narcissa transformed the rather dark and gloomy house into one of such grandeur that would put the Malfoy's to shame.

"Your room, of course, if yours to do as you will," Bellatrix said pulling off her coat. "I've told the house-elves that they are to get anything you want."

"My room?"

Bellatrix raised her eyebrow. "You sound surprised?"

"I'm staying here?"

"Sometimes," she shrugged and snapped her fingers. A house-elf immediately appeared, taking their things and then notifying that there was tea in the drawing room.

"What about mother and father?" Narcissa asked following her sister through the house to the drawing room. Bellatrix plonked herself down on a great armchair and Narcissa took up the one opposite, taking the role of the hostess in pouring the tea.

"They are with our aunt and uncle most of the time. They had no objections to you staying with me," Bellatrix said taking up a teacup. "So, how was your time at that dreary place?"

"Fine," Narcissa murmured and Bellatrix gave her a look of disbelief.

"That's not what I heard. Seems that you were slacking in your work and had to have a word with Slughorn."

"How do you know that?" Narcissa glared at her.

"Slughorn talks you know – especially to our family. It's not hard to get information," Bellatrix rolled her eyes.

"Well I would appreciate it if you didn't spy on me," Narcissa told her hotly.

"Spying? Hardly. But mind telling me why you have been doing so poorly at school?"

"You're not my mother," Narcissa scowled at her putting down her tea. "Besides, I thought you said that school work hardly counted for much in real life," she added sarcastically.

"Oh, look who is getting all bitchy," Bellatrix murmured without so much as a blink. "And I wasn't referring to everything so I'd _appreciate_ it if you didn't take my words out of context."

Narcissa leaned back in the chair moodily staring at the fireplace and hating how dirty it was. Honestly, how hard would it be to brighten this place up? Her sister rose from her chair and crouched down by her, the smirk on her face did nothing to pacify her.

"Going into a strop? Cissy, you're not a child."

"Really?" she glared at her. "Last time I checked you were still calling me that."

Bellatrix looked at her mockingly. "Well, if you insist on acting like one..."

Narcissa pushed herself out of the chair nearly knocking her sister over in the process. "You're so infuriating!"

"What's new there?" Bellatrix came closer to her. "What's wrong? Weren't my letters, the presents, weren't they enough?"

"It's got nothing to do with that. And they were hardly letters," Narcissa snapped crossing her arms. She had loved receiving the constant gifts and notes but they still couldn't take the edge off that she felt.

"Look, you're just going to have to get over the fact that I am married," Bellatrix said with some impatience. "I've told you a thousand times: it doesn't _mean_ anything."

"And will you "get over it" when I marry?"

That stopped her and Bellatrix eyed her steadily, the air suddenly tense and Narcissa wished she hadn't said that. Of course she would marry, an advantageous marriage most likely, but she didn't want her sister to know that their mother was already accumulating a list of possible husbands and that she, in private, was doing something of a similar kind.

"You have years before you have to think of that," Bellatrix said lowly and Narcissa nodded wanting to move past this subject.

"Yes, it was just a flying comment."

Bellatrix stared at her for a long hard moment before tossing her head back and Narcissa swallowed.

"Will you tell me then?" Bellatrix asked, taking up her hand and Narcissa sighed.

"I just kept thinking how you were so far away… and here with him," she looked at their hands and squeezed. "I missed you."

"It's not been easy for me either," Bellatrix tugged her so that she could wrap her arm about her waist. "But I don't want to fight. Let me show you your room."

"Aren't you going to kiss me?" Narcissa pouted and Bellatrix chuckled darkly. She caressed her sister's face and dipped her head down pressing their mouths together. Narcissa eagerly responded and her hands came up to tangle in her sister's dark hair. She had desperately wanted this and now she was here she didn't want to waste time. One hand strayed down to the ties of her sister's dress when Bellatrix pulled back and stopped her hand.

"Not now," she told her and took her hand, taking her out of the drawing room towards the stairs. Narcissa was blinked after her and let herself be pulled along, climbing up the large staircase till they reached the landing. There Bellatrix murmured to her that on the right down three rooms was her room and all the way down at the end was her husband's. Then she tugged her down the corridor in the opposite direction and opened a door, pushing them inside the room.

"I thought you'd prefer the view," Bellatrix said as Narcissa stepped further inside and scanned the place. It was huge and, taking a quick peek at the window, she could see that her view was a nice one. Though it, like the rest of the house, was in need of redecoration she thought. She turned back to her sister who was leaning against the back of the door watching her carefully.

"I'm so far from you," she said at last.

"Not too far. You can do what you will with the room," Bellatrix pushed off and paced. "Unpack if you want."

Her sister was distracted that much was obvious and she felt irked at the little attention she was getting from her. So she went towards her and dismissed Bellatrix's little noise of discouragement, placing her hands on her waist and pressed kisses up her neck and along her jaw. Bellatrix made a feeble attempt to shrug her off then gave in a little, lifting her neck up so her sister had better access and ran her fingers through her blonde hair. Narcissa kissed down, tugging at the laces at the front of dress and dragged her mouth along the tops of Bellatrix's breasts as she pushed them towards the bed. Flopping Bellatrix back onto the mattress, Narcissa clambered up and grinned down, her heart raced excitedly and her fingers parted the top half of her dress before she twisted her arms behind her and unzipped her dress that she had changed into on the train. Her sister watched every movement with darkening eyes and when Narcissa unclasped her bra, she stretched out her hand to run her finger over the curve of one then down her stomach, pushing down the dress to around her waist.

She was dimly aware that the door wasn't locked and had no certain idea as to when Bellatrix's husband was returning home but she had waited, _wanted_, too long. She pulled the fabric of her sister's dress aside enough to slip her hand and cup her breast. Bellatrix watched her, licking her lips absently before making a small sound as Narcissa toyed with her nipple through the fabric of her bra. She leaned up to claim her mouth, holding the back of Narcissa's head and pulling her down with her. Narcissa struggled with getting Bellatrix's dress down and they broke apart so that her sister could sit up and strip to her waist.

"Oh!"

Bellatrix looked up sharply and saw that her sister was staring at her with wide horrified eyes. Her brow furrowed and then glanced down, grimacing with realisation. Across her arms, the pale skin was covered with cuts and scratches, some healed and scabbing whilst others still held that rawness of a fresh wound. She couldn't look at her, lowering her head and her fists clenched in the sheets.

"Bella, what have you done?" Narcissa whispered and gently took one of her hands into her own.

"It's nothing," Bellatrix replied but her voice was thick and she swallowed. She tried to kiss her again but Narcissa pulled back and raised her sister's right arm up for inspection. Sudden tears burned in her eyes as she imagined the pain she must as felt as she did every single one.

"Bella… why?" she gently lowered her arm.

"Feels good," Bellatrix murmured then drew up her legs to her chest.

Narcissa felt her heart break and knelt up, leaning towards her and cupped her face with her hands. "I hate to think of you doing this to yourself. I don't want you to hurt and like it."

"Well don't think about it then," she snapped defensively but Narcissa paid her no mind.

"Of course I will, I love you and so it hurts me when you hurt."

Bellatrix snorted but peered at her and Narcissa gently kissed her. Then she so very lightly kissed her shoulder then down her arm. Bellatrix's heart hammered in her chest as she barely felt her sister's lips brush over her bloody and broken skin but the action itself made tears prick her own eyes. Noticing her sister's reaction, Narcissa stopped and kissed her again but with slightly more force and pressed her back till she was lying on her back with Narcissa half on top of her.

"What makes you do it?" Narcissa breathed against her neck as she picked up from where they had stopped.

"Just get overwhelmed," Bellatrix's breath hitched as Narcissa unclasped her bra and licked before sucked one nipple into her mouth. "I miss you."

Narcissa released her nipple, skimming her mouth towards the other. "I'm here now. You don't have to do it, you can talk to me."

"And when you go?"

Narcissa looked up at her. "Then write to me, send me a howler – I don't care just don't do this."

"Not so simple," she whispered but was barely listening anymore as she felt Narcissa's fingers stroke her thighs.

"Bella-"

"Narcissa," Bellatrix warned and Narcissa sighed then planted a kiss on her stomach.

"Just wanted to say that I'm here," Narcissa mumbled and it was Bellatrix's turn to sigh as she threaded her fingers through her sister's hair.

"I know," she said bringing her up to kiss her. "I know. Now fuck me."

Narcissa couldn't help the corners of her mouth kicking up and did precisely what her sister asked.

-/-

She was dreaming, the scenes hazy and shifting so that Hogwarts merged into her home and then the Forbidden Forest. She was running but not from something or someone but _to_ something. Except her legs were so slow and she couldn't get them to go faster… She needed to get to this place… she had to…

She jolted awake when she heard something crash downstairs. Her heart thumped madly in her chest as she sat up, pushed back the covers and got to her feet. It was incredibly dark in her room and she fumbled to find her wand for light. Then she stood there holding her breath and listened before a high-pitched shriek erupted and she ran to her door. She just opened it when a man appeared making her nearly scream until she saw it was Rabastan. He pushed her back inside just as she heard her sister shout something and then it was silent again.

"What-"

"It's nothing. Just go back to bed," he commanded but she tried to push past him.

"What's happening? Is my sister alright? What was that crash and that scream?"

"It's nothing," he hissed and shoved her back. "Bella is fine, we just need you to go back to bed."

"We?"

"Your sister, my brother and I," he said impatiently. "Just go to sleep."

"I won't if you don't tell me what's going on," she replied hotly.

"Look, you can ask your sister tomorrow but now just go to fucking sleep," he snapped and then closed the door tightly and heard him lock her in. She banged her fist on the wood as she shouted out in protest and then another shriek sounded, one from a woman she was sure. She was about to unlock the door when she froze, hearing her sister laugh suddenly. It was a laugh she hadn't heard before, high and maniacal and it made her shiver at the utter glee it expressed. She pulled back from the door and got into bed, tugging up the covers and covered her ears. Yet the sound still echoed around in her head and she squeezed her eyes shut.

Hours later, just before dawn and she was still awake, her door was unlocked and in her doorway, Bellatrix stood. Narcissa kept silent and her sister left after a few moments and Narcissa rolled onto her back and stared at the ceiling till she fell into troubled dreams.

/

She asked the next morning but naturally she received no answer. Rodolphus and his brother were already gone and Bellatrix reclined lazily in her seat smoking when Narcissa came down. From what she could see there was no signs of any disruption and she felt mildly disappointed that she couldn't investigate further. Instead, she found herself being taken back upstairs with her sister hungrily kissing her as if she had been starved of her for days.

It wasn't an unpleasant way to spend her time but as they lay in her bed, Narcissa knew that if she was going to get any answers she was going to have to ask someone else. Lucius, she thought when she remembered what he had said to her, that he had seen a side to her sister that she hadn't. Then Bellatrix announced that she would be busy the next few days and it would be best if Narcissa went home. Rather than arguing, she nodded acceptingly and slightly relieved. If she was going to communicate with Malfoy it was best to do so when her sister wasn't nearby. But for the time being she let her sister lavish all her attention upon her, knowing that moments like there were precious enough now that her sister's life seemed to be filled with mysterious activities.

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><p><strong>AN:** TBC...


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